Doesn't ANYBODY believe in marriage anymore?

I don't really get it either. from the other answers I read, it seems people think of marriage as just a piece of paper- a process they can live without, a ritual. Also, some have quoted divorce rates as a reason to not get married.

Marriage is not just a piece of paper and a ritual, it is about a formal PUBLIC comittment to love someone for the rest of your life, and by loving- I mean All that encompases (in sickness and in health) and all that jazz. it is about formally combining not only 2 lives into one, but two people into one whole (this is what sharing the last name does in a marriage commitment). It's the same as not being afraid to tell and show other people- heck, the world YOU LOVE THIS PERSON! Anyone in love would want to do this!

As for the divorce rates, yes, not all people who get married stay married, but I wuld think that at least taking the time, energy and willingness to commit to the other person should count for something? It's like the saying goes, "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". No one is willing to put fourth the time and energy (and yes, sometimes money! lol) to "buy the cow"!

As for statistics, I found some interesting info about this from a neutral source (as much as I LOVE focus on the Family!)

http://www.leaderu.com/critical/cohabitation-socio...

I think we all need structure and stability to have a happy and truly sucessful life! And I know people can be happy and all that, but wouldn't you want to be as happy as you can be and have the best life possible, not just an average one? Just sayin!

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RE:

Doesn't ANYBODY believe in marriage anymore?

Ugh. So every now and then someone on Yahoo Answers will ask a question that just gets under my skin... well lately, I've been seeing the same types of questions... "Me and my boyfriend are both in college but I really want to have a baby now.. is it a good time?"

I don't get...

ill answer the marriage question then the college question (as i feel they are very separate issues.)

I feel (this is just my feelings on the subject) that a lot of people don't "believe" in marriage anymore because marriage just isn't what it used to be.

Divorce rates are through the roof:

The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%

The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%

The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%

so people start to ask themselves "whats the point?" i know i do, i love my fiancee dearly (i honestly don't think i could live without him) we have been together 8years (from when i was 14 & he was 16) we have had ups and downs and been through everything together, puberty, joy, moving country together, university, sadness, parental adultery, death etc.... been there done that, we know what we are made of as a couple and we see absolutely no point in that "paper" we have a marriage already we don't need "proof" of our love, if this was 50years ago when marriage meant something and people worked at it then i would be straight in for marriage but today its all about having a wedding and then if things go wrong they jump over board.

i feel marriage has become a mockery and ill be pissed if someone tries to compare my relationship as "less meaningful or less committed" than those who have a "piece of paper" and have only been together 4years and already divorced.

I know 6 couples who have been together 40+ years each and they are NOT married, i only know 1 married couple that hasn't been divorced at least once and that my parents. commitment is STAYING together and showing love, respect and constant care for each, not a piece of paper.

i believe a couple should be together at least 4years before they bring a baby into the mix as this gives plenty of time for true colours and just for each other.

College - I have no clue why someone would want a baby in college, i REALLY wanted a baby during my 2nd year of university but i held myself knowing and picturing all the good i could do for my baby with that degree. yes you don't need a degree to be an awesome parent but if you have the chance to get a job that could afford your family 3 great holidays a year and those "teen" years of "i need the new Iphone mommy" and you can deliver (to a point that's not spoiling them) then why not give your family that?

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/yxS7o

Yes, I'm sorry to the rest of you, but I agree.

The fact is, most people live in a society where they are expected to follow the "norm". That's why people are having babies so early in life, without even contemplating marriage first, because it is deemed as "normal". I think it is sad how these people feel like they should follow others just to maintain self esteem, what kind of life is that?

I totally agree with you. I don't believe in having sex or children before marriage, and I just find it sad that people are doing this. Marriage IS more than just a piece of paper. I don't have a problem with people have children young, as long as they're mature and married. I'm 20, married and pregnant with my first. We're very excited, but never would have dreamed of living together or having kids before marriage. I just think people don't take life seriously anymore, that marriage doesn't matter. After all, if you don't get married, you don't ever have to get a divorce right? The thinking should be that divorce isn't really even an option!

My boyfriend and I have been togeteher for 4 years. We just built a house. He is 36 and I am 29, our daughter is 4 months. We did plan her. I stopped taking birth control and we got pregnant. Will we ever get married, I don't know. Would I like to, yes. We love each other and we love our daughter very much. We are both employed and have a pretty good life. We did/do have our issues, and maybe that's why we didn't get married. He has some issues from his past, and so do I that maybe deter us from getting married, but it doesn't make us any better or worse than people who are married with kids. For us, we didn't/don't need to be married to love our daughter and have a positive relationship and give her positive influences.

Lots of people don't get married these days or don't see why its necessary to get married to have a child. I have been married 5 years and have a 6.5 month old but that was my choice. Being married doesn't make us anymore of a family then a non-married couple with a child or make us anymore qualified to be parents. As for starting a family while still in college....I think thats a bit silly but again...not my choice and not my life so whatever.

things change. Over the years people seem to have lost their values and morals that you saw in, say, the 50s. Some decades ago teenage pregnancy was horribly shocking, but now it's just a common thing. Something tells me it's not because parents are raising their kids to be this way, or are bad parents, but it's just the times. The media, new thoughts on life and what is normal and okay. Luckily I've kept myself out of that sort of trouble, im nearly 19 and have never been pregnant, I take pride in that, especially looking at girls i went to school with who had one kid or multiple kids before they graduated high school. It is pretty sickening, although I havent much noticed anything about marriage and planned children in people early 20s and younger, I believe it. There isnt too much to be done about it unless everyone was forced to have their tubes tied before they got married and were of a decent age, mid 20s or so..however old most people are at the time of being newlyweds and new parents. It's just the way things are and I really dont see anything changing about that in the future. I wouldent be surprised if in a few years, 90% of people were pregnant or eloping before they were 20 years old

I agree, but I'm from the South and we still have the "Southern values" lol. To me the steps in creating a family always went: marriage THEN baby. I mean sure people get pregnant by accident, way of life, but I don't know why you would purposely have a baby under certain circumstances.