Is it customary for a stepfather to continue to provide for a 21 yr old step dauter, her boyfriend, and thier?

of course they taking advantage, you are not allowing them to take responsibility for getting things together themselves, talk time coming up I think. Ask straight out is he trying to get work, what jobs needed to be their responsibility in the house, how much do they pay towards the costs of the household, if they do not pay, then they must start.Set some guidelines the quicker the better, as as long as you continue to do this they have no reason to try to help themselves.

I think what you did was great! I was in that same position. My mom took me back in against her will. I had gone away to college and could not afford to have a place of my own. The economy is HORRIBLE right now. i went on interview after interview. It took me almost a year to get a job. And even then it was only one day a week. Just recently i got a full time job and am set to move out june 30th. I say give it some more time and encourage the BF to keep looking for a job. Or maybe set a day for them to be gone by. A mother will always feel protective of her kids. But you're doing a great thing. Don't give up on them just yet.

I would say that things like this are going to happen more often with the economy the way it is.

BY letting them stay your are showing your wife how much SHE means to you. She is going to worry about her kids no matter what. I would sit them all down and lay down some ground rules.Like they have to be actively seeking employment or enrolled in school to get an education so that they can get on their feet permanently.

I am having a similar situation at home , but it is my daughter and her child.

If you want to do that great! I had to do something like that. Only I set a time limit. 3 Months. After 3 months they had to go some where else, if he didn't find work first and get them moved out.

It's natural but very unwise for your marriage and the kids. You did right to say no. Give the couple who are there now a time limit to move out.

You will be the bad guy but it's the right thing to do.

Or everyone could live there and you could move out. :)

I think you got yourself a family who like free riding

seems like you hit the jackpot

congrats

No it's not customary.

If anything your wife should be providing for them but they really should be providing for themselves.

they should move away and get their own place. its not fair to you to have to provide for some bum who wants free food and bedding with out working for it. he should get his lazy *** of the couch and get a job. peace.