Am I overreacting? Husband/boundary question?

I completely agree with you. It is an inappropriate reaction. However, I agree with you that I don't think there's anything really going on because you know that he's calling her. He might not tell you before he calls her, but you know that he speaks to her, so it's not like it's a secret. I hear more about my husband's life when he talks to friends or family members as well. I think that's just a part of being married for awhile--they think that we don't want to know what's going on in their lives. It makes no sense, I know. We're their wives! If you were to ask him questions, I wonder if he'd tell you about his life like he tells her.

Hang in there. Don't tell him in a rude way that you want him to stop hanging out with her. Just let him know that you don't like the way that it feels. Ask him out of curiosity how he might feel if you were to hang out with someone else's husband. Or how he might feel about you hanging out with a single, young classmate for a study group. Maybe he'll understand how you feel then.

I flipped over to your side when you mentioned that you hear more about his thoughts and day when you overhear him on the phone to her. It is hard to say whether or not he feels anything untoward for her or not, or if she is just a better listener than you are.

I guess I would not say anything now - but I'd start making sure that I wasn't neglecting him in some way. Maybe if you show more of an interest in what his day is like and what is going on with him, he wouldn't be sharing all that with someone else.

I'd also tell him that you are not comfortable with his spending time at her house [kids or no kids] when you and her husband aren't there.

So, no, you are not overreacting, but I would perceive it more as a sign that something isn't quite right between you and him, and maybe not so much that he is cheating.

No you aren't overreacting, you are just being concerned. It's normal. I know that "not knowing a dog's history" is a big issue for people when adopting a dog. That is usually the case which stops a person from doing so. And it's true, you never know how the dog is going to behave. Most shelters do temperament testing, which is usually promising. They test them with young children, cats, and dogs. You could always visit the dog you are interested in, in your free time. Spend some time with that dog and if you really start liking the dog.. bring your dog a few times to come meet the dog you are interested in adopting. If everything goes well and YOU feel comfortable adopting the dog, then so be it. You might want to look into adopting a young adult. Another scenario is, (using my shelter as an example) A LOT of dogs in our shelters come from homes that can no longer care for the dog. Maybe, by any chance you come across someone that is going to give up there dog, you can have a little chat with the owner.

Apparently, you don't trust him or else this wouldn't be an issue. And hanging out with a married woman when neither spouse is present doesn't automatically sound like something inappropriate just he's a man and she's a woman. Being married doesn't restrict you to only being around friends of the opposite sex as long as your spouse is around. And if it is, I have to wonder if that's one of the reasons a lot of people opt not to marry. Also, it seems absolutely ridiculous that he would have to announce that he's about to call her before actually picking up the phone.

Your concern seems like something that either a jealous and insecure wife would have and/or that a woman who had something they didn't want others to know about her, would have. If you're neither, I can't see why you have a problem. The only real concern that you can fairly bring up is that he's talking behind your back. Whether what he's saying is negative or positive, it wouldn't be out of the ordinary to ask him to stop talking about you about your back. But just going to visit without you seems like he needs adult supervision to go to a buddies house to play and if I were him, I'd be upset by that.

You have every right to be suspicious of this behavior. I feel this behavior is inappropriate. If it is making you uneasy then you have every right in mentioning it to your husband. Approach him stating that you do not feel it is appropriate he is hangin out with her by himself. this is not distrust, this is being sensible. As his wife, again, you have the RIGHT to voice your concerns. Say something now before its too late, and pray something isnt already going on. If nothing is going on between the two he shouldnt have a problem with it. If worse comes to worse, you might have to call the woman up and let her know as well the behavior isnt appreciated. They are both playing with fire if you ask me

no i would tell that woman to talk to her own husband about her day and leave your husband alone along with that tell your husband that you love and trust him but that its not right the way he is with the neighbor lady and people might get the wrong idea and start talking; if you let it go on without addressing it you will just start feeling resentment later on

I don't think you are overreacting..and I would not feel comfortable if my husband did that. You should defi have a talk with him and let him know how you feel about it before things gets worse and you cannot control it.

It's inappropriate to say the least. He should be talking to you, about you and him, and your relationship. It might be innocent but they are telling tales out of school and eventually they will cross the line.

Absolutely inappropriate and he knows it. But he will blame you and make you feel very bad if you bring it up. He will do this because he knows he is guilty and needs to defend himself.

I would completely bring it up and let him know very clearly that I KNOW this is WRONG and that he will NOT make me feel bad about it, because the one messing up is HIM!

it may seem innocent enough right now but cheating always begins somewhere. it will eventually cross the line if you don't do anything about it...