why is so hard to get a guy to talk?

Be patient.

Pay very, very close attention to the way a man talks about/interacts with an ex. This is essentially the way he feels about/treats all women, including you.

It's fundamentally weird to maintain a relationship with ex unless you have children together and a custody arrangement of some kind. This guy seems to be someone who 'likes to keep his options open.' Translation: He's using both of you and maybe others, too. The problem: You're in the courtship period of the relationship and already you've noted a problem with this ongoing relationship with ex. This is as good as it's going to get.

In spite of this, you still give him everything he wants and why? For a bit of jewelry and not even the good stuff. Why, I wonder? Surely your favors are worth more than a dime-store ring?

His spin on the break-up suggests not only poor negotiating skills in relationships but carelessness and maybe recklessness when it comes to finances and taking responsibility for poor decision-making. Altogether, this relationship sounds like another accident waiting to happen. Free advice: Re-cast your line and hold out for better.

Cut your losses and don't waste your time . Why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory? Don't want to hear it? Fine. Here's the answer you're looking for, "Hang in there, baby. He's not the loser everybody's telling you he is. If you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own sexual needs, you can have him!" But please don't be surprised if he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.

He is a man made up entirely of your excuses. And the minute you stop making excuses for him, he will completely disappear from your life.

He will always be able to play the "friend" card on you. He only has to be responsible for the expectations of a friend, rather than the the far greater expectations of a boyfriend. He's got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefits of a girlfriend, whom he can see or not see whenever he wants to. He may be one of your closest friends, but I'm sorry to say ... as a boyfriend, he's just not that into you.

I don't want to be "sort of dating" someone. I don't want to be "kinda hanging out" with someone. I don't want to spend a lot of energy suppressing my feelings so I appear uninvolved. I want to be involved. I want to be sleeping with someone I know I'll see again because they've already demonstarted to me that they're trustworthy and honorable -- and into me.

He said someday...

Someday means a day of his choosing in the future.

You could nag him into doing it sooner, since he's already made a commitment, that's what happens to most guys anyway.

Sounds to me like your guy is not the only one having trouble talking.

Speak up, Let HIM know what you are feeling and thinking.

Yeah, right.