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Filipino-Hawaiian culture - how do you remember all the customs and rules and more?
My son (a 20-y.o. Caucasian mainlander) as been seriously dating a girl from Hawaii, whose parents are Filipino (as in, emigrated from the Philippines). I've TRIED to acculturate, but to little avail. The girl barely speaks to me and just to my wife when asked. She told my son and wife that girls are taught not to address boys and kids aren't allowed to address adults first. But after FOUR years, and staying with us for 6 months, you'd think she'd be more comfortable! Is this something that will ever change?
Also, despite all this talk of respect and modesty, she can be very pushy and orders our son around like a servant (she's quite well-off, so maybe that's it). I don't think it's "respectful" to do that, nor to ignore someone when they're trying to engage you in conversation.
I wouldn't care so much if I wasn't pretty sure he intends to marry her! HELP! And no "Haole" trashing, please. Been there, heard that!
1 Answer
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
It sounds she has been brought up pretty traditionally...I have had experiences whith alot of Filipino girls they seem to be pushy and sometimes plain rude.I am not saying that about all Filipino girls but alot of the ones I've met have been.Maybe If you can't talk to her and explain that you feel disrespected by her actions you can ask your son to.The culture is very different from ours and is hard to understand but I would try talking to her and see if she can better explain why she acts that way toward you..You also have to be careful to not offend her and try to be as understanding to her culture as you can.You seem to be understanding and are trying so hopefully you all can communicate.
