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how do you ask a controling ensecure man, you need a weekend away?
My fiance of 5 years have been smothering me for years. i am either with my kids or with him. i never get "alone" "me" time. i always attending to the kids 24/7, but when they are asleep i am waiting on him hand and foot.
he sees that i dont need time away. he gets angerd very quickly and frustrated. i know in every realtionship people need there alone time. i am taking a weekend to myself with out him or the kids but i need to bring it up gently. how do i do that? i am not leaving him at all, i just need time to find myself again and enjoy the things i use to do with a girlfriend. it has been 5 years sence i have been alone.
how should i bring this up with out upsetting him?
7 Answers
- ?Lv 51 decade agoFavorite Answer
well if you have been engaged for 5 years you need to realise this man isn't good marriage material if he is this smothering, just imagine this life for many more years you will go mad. Tell him you are going away for the weekend with a friend and if he has a problem with it go anyway, you are equal in this relationship and you shouldn't have to wait on him hand and foot. he is a man and he can do things for himself.
good luck and stay Strong :) p.s. i wouldn't marry this guy.
Source(s): me :) - Anonymous1 decade ago
For starters, you are definitely going about this the wrong way. You don't go from 0 in 5 years to a full 2-3 days away. A weekend to yourself is too long, start with a night out instead, or a "most of the day saturday". The full weekend is too big a jump and he'll be even more expecting that you are meeting a man somewhere for shennanigans.
- GracieLv 41 decade ago
If you have to be on eggshells all the time and you aren't even married to him yet, why bother? Five years is way too long to be engaged. An engagement is a time to plan a wedding, not an excuse for living together. Do you trust him with the kids?
- 1 decade ago
He's going to be upset with any attempt you make to have some independence. The question I have is why are you still with him? You've been engaged for 5 years and haven't married yet. Clearly there's something wrong with his behaviour. You'd be better off leaving him altogether. find someone who will treat you like a human being instead of like an item to be owned.
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- Don't SplashLv 51 decade ago
It looks like you were married before, having kids. Or, if you had the kids with your fiance there is definitely poor planning here. He could be controlling because of the kids.
Sorry, the picture is not clear.
- 1 decade ago
He is just ur fiance and u feel this way about him?
If u marry him u r an idiot and get what u deserve. A miserable life.
Oh wait u u have his babies, or atleast someones babies.
If I were king, stupidity would be against the law, and people would have to qualify to have kids.
- F. PerduraboLv 71 decade ago
Wow, engaged for 5 years?
You TELL him you're going away. You are an equal part of this relationship. Why are you letting him tell you what to do?
