Here's a question for Mormon church members out there.?

I left six years ago after being a faithful and serious member for my whole life. Seminary grad, went to a church university, stellar LDS mission, every calling you can name and my final calling was in a Bishopric.

My journey out came in waves. I had doubts like most people but I put those on the shelf. But the first wave came when I studied the coercive influence tactics of cults. The LDS church uses many of them and I began to see it much more clearly. I wondered why we were so judgmental of each other; why do we encourage little kids to declare a belief they don't have? Why do ladies caught in adultry have to confess to me in a church court when Jesus paid the penalty for the sin? And so forth.

Then I began to research LDS church history and doctrinal changes when a guy in my ward was questioning the sacred stories. I hadn't really done much research other than read guys like Nibley, Anderson, and others rebutting the attacks on the church. Wow, was I surprised by what I read! And sadly, I found that my own church, the one I trusted, had lied to me about so many things. I had been duped, played, betrayed by people and leaders I trusted. I had given my life to a lie.

But I had Jesus. He led me out. My cult research taught me how to handle my leaders when they had no answers for me so they tried guilt, shame, accusation, fear, or anything else to get me to shut up and stay faithful to the lie. God protected as I sat in Stake President's office and just couldn't believe the stupidity coming out the mouth of the SP. I'm the problem rather the church, it's leaders, and prophets lying? Right.

It's been painful. Only one of my sons followed me out. The rest of the family have attempted to reduce my influence through personal disparagement. They make the most of my setbacks and try to ignore my successes, hoping that God will smite me. But he hasn't. Instead God has lifted me up and has opened up His blessings in ways I can barely count.

I have an assurance of salvation; I go to a church where gifts of the spirit are common. God leads me like I've never been led. Mormonism seems like a cheap knockoff in comparison to true Christianity. I wish it were otherwise, but Mormonism is a lie. Painful as it's been to leave, I have no regrets for walking in integrity, not the slightest.

I left because I couldn't believe in a God who demanded so many rules and ordinances and authorities. What kind of parent would reject his own children because some guy hadn't said the right words over therm? What kind of parent would only let some of them be with their loved ones after death because someone had married them in a special building?

The idea that there is only one true church that 99% of God's children have never even heard of? It makes no sense.

I was out for decades when I was asked to do a family genealogy project and I discovered the real history of the church along with the history of my family.

It was just mind boggling to compare what I'd been told about church history and what really happened. Since then I've talked to other ex Mormons about the problems with the leadership (a 3 billion dollar mall while members in Africa starve?), and learned about so many contradictions it makes my head spin. And then there is the Book of Mormon and the junk science that the church uses to support its claims. Outside the church, it is clearly seen as a hoax on the level of Bigfoot.

It took quite a bit of time to figure out why my intuition was screaming at me that it was all wrong, and I was inactive too, and avoided it. Finally however it all made sense. It's a fraud. That explains everything.

Just out of curiosity, why would you ask mormon church members why they left...? If they left they're no longer mormon church members, are they? :)

Yes, I was a member, raised in the church, went on a mission, etc. Left about 6 months after coming back from my mission. I left because I could no longer contain the cognitive dissonance that was required to remain in the church. I had doubts about many things in the church since I had been about 12, but suppressed most of them and succumbed to peer pressure. Going through the temple weirdness was the beginning of the end for me, starting my education and learning to think critically pushed it along, then a "church court" that claimed inspiration from god yet got a "verdict" that I knew to be wrong (for a friend) was one of the last straws. I left.

Too many things claimed as absolutes by the church that have been absolutely proven wrong. And too much intellectual dishonesty among members who ignore and deny facts in order to hang onto their precious place in the celestial kingdom.

Peace.

I'm still active and have no plans of leaving it, but it's not like I have never considered it.

I am a minority (Hispanic) and I happen to have a "mixed" skin tone that is darker than lighter. Well, I had great missionaries and the ones who taught me before I baptized, never told me about the whole mark of Cain deal and about the church's racist history. I was so hurt I was very close to giving up. I decided to stay, but it bugs me so freaking much to just think about it.

There are some stuff I think are crazy-ish. I don't think God needs a human sinner (prophet) to help him. I don't think Brigham Young was a well-intentioned man. I can't stand what the church says about widowed women who married in the temple while widowed men have all the freedom. I can't stand the self-righteousness. I can't stand how the church is so defensive about the "mark of Cain" because racism is racism, period. Also, green Jell-O sucks :)

But in the other hand, I love the principles, the idea that I can eternally be with my family, the idea that I can be sealed in the temple to someone I love for eternity, how the church discourages the bashing of other religions. I get so much love from my fellow members in my student ward and family branch (note, I mentioned I'm a dark-ish-skinned minority, but no one has ever discriminated against me over that).

I love the church, but I try to think for myself on stuff. I wouldn't let the church tell me who to vote for or make me believe something I don't, so I guess I'm just a Jack Mormon, but I wouldn't leave. After all, I believe more than I don't.

I wonder how many of them know about the Mormon 9/11...... in 1857, Mormons, along with the Paiute indians with whom they had a treaty, slaughtered 120 men, women, and children that were a wagon train bound for California, in the Mountain Meadows area of southwest Utah. Their only "sin" was being "Gentiles". They were from Arkansas and Missouri. The Mormons had been run out of Missouri, and their leader, Joseph Smith killed. Every Mormon man swore an oath to "do his duty" to avenge the death of Joseph Smith, their self-proclaimed "prophet", 'whenever a chance presents itself'. Their president at the time was none other than Brigham Young. I doubt that any action was taken without his express consent, but if you look up the murderous act in the LDS website (Mountain Meadows Massacre), their writer is quite proficient at making the church seem innocent of the blood that was spilled. He mentions "militia" that were involved in the attack, but fails to say that all of the militia members were Mormons. Hmm..... imagine that.

Asking for only serious answers is going to limit the number of responses

I'm inactive at most times...but I wouldn't leave the church. I would go on a mission actually. It's just that...my family sucks. And I haven't really read the scriptures....staying in church is good...but when you have problems at home...its hard to stay at church

I left because, it has too many "rules" that are against my personal feelings. I didn't really join in the first place, I was brainwashed by my parents. I started doubting it when I was 12 and eventually was convinced there is no god.

everyone's answer is different, of course- just like everyone's answer for JOINING the church is different.

If you can't come up with your own answer to the question, perhaps you should be looking inwardly, instead of at other peoples' reasoning.

I just never really believed all that.