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Bringing home a newborn with a toddler?

My son is two weeks old now, so I guess we've been home about a week and a half. My daughter, who is 18 months, has been absolutely wonderful. She pats him on the head (gently, of course) and gives him kisses on the forehead, and I swear I've heard her say "brother" a few times. She even goes over to his pack-n-play to check on him when he starts crying. She's even been behaving better in other respects; she's attempting more words, she's acting better at mealtimes (although she was never really bad, and she is starting to get to the "picky eater" stage). She's suddenly (like, overnight) trying to be more independant, wanting to drink from adult cups and wanting to feed herself all the time, which she never really was interested in.

What has happened to my daugher?? Where is my little hellion with the temper tantrums and the screaming fits? I expected unbridled jealousy, and instead I get this little angel. I've got to admit, I'm not sure how to take it.

Kidding! I'm glad she's taking it better than I expected.

Anyway, all joking aside, there's one thing I've noticed that is kind of weird to me. All of a sudden she's carrying her "lovey" around all the time. She used to just hug it when she went to sleep, but now she carries it all around the house. She asks for it (usually just by pointing, granted) at the strangest times, like when she's eating or sitting on the couch with us, or playing with another toy. Is this normal? Do you think it's her way of comforting herself with all the changes that have been going on around here? Should I encourage her to keep carrying it around, or try to keep her from becoming too dependant on it? There's no harm in her being attatched to a stuffed toy... Right?

4 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    My son was exactly the same when we had our second son. He was also 18 months and was in love with his brother from the second he was born. I have never had any issues with jealousy and my youngest is now 10 months. They are the best of buddies :) And yes, it is normal for her to suddenly mature, she knows she is no longer the baby of the family. Sounds like you have a well adjusted, happy little girl who has embraced her role as big sister :) We are the lucky ones - enjoy your siblings!!

    ETA: There is absolutely no harm in her being attached to a stuffed toy. My son had a paci, this was his comfort thing, and he did start wanting it alot more once new baby was born. Just before he was 2 he said "yucky", threw it in the bin and that was the end of the paci. It sort of made me sad because he did grow up so quickly after he became a big brother - he even potty trained himself at 21 months!!

  • 1 decade ago

    Mom of 5 here, I've noticed that toddlers can act more mature and "grown up" around a newborn if you make them feel like "part of the team" when helping with the baby, and when they see the adults approve of this big kid behavior they like the feeling of being like a "grown up" and will continue to act this way.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    I ready my daughter good earlier than hand. Explaining that there was once a child brother/sister in my stomach. I purchased her a doll and taught her the way to maintain a child,wrap a child,difference a nappy,shower a child. I confirmed her image's of herself as a child and her ultrasound photos new and we in comparison her's and the brand new infants ultrasounds. I instructed her experiences approximately her while she was once a child. She got here to all my appointments and my Dr was once high-quality and allow my daughter use the doppler to listen to the infants middle beat and allow her degree my stomach to peer how tremendous the child was once getting. When my moment daughter was once born my first daughter was once 24 months historical. I walked into the residence maintaining the child and she or he requested if "that" was once her sister, all of the whilst hopping onto the living room and solving the cushions so she would maintain the child :-) So as quickly as she knew it was once truthfully HER sister, she needed to have first maintain. And she did exceptional good. From the second her sister was once born she was once her little protector. She watched her whilst she slept and each-time the child moved she'd inform me or if the child made a noise and so on. Her eyes on no account left her sister for the ones first few months. She was once continually involved approximately whether or not the child wanted a feed or a nappy difference. I stuck her a couple of occasions exchanging her sisters nappy! She did rather good too. She was once allowed to opt for her sisters clothes for the day (out of three clothes I'd already selected) at bathtub time it was once her process to scrub her sisters legs and ft. She was once simply robust. It was once like my moment daughter had simply continually been there. After a couple of months she received over the joy and simply desired her sister to be ready to play together with her. No jealousy or violence closer to her sister, no regressing or some thing like that. She stopped looking her sister like a hawk however as quickly as her sister made a noise she was once over to her to make her snigger or distract whilst I made lunch and so on. Oh and while different folks held her sister she was once correct subsequent to them telling them the way to do it and the way she appreciated to be held and so on. I additionally made a factor that nobody was once allowed to fuss over the child with out first fussing over "the tremendous sister" first. So she was once continually felt cherished and did not pass over any awareness. They at the moment are eight and six and did a high-quality process while their brother was once born a yr in the past. We went by way of the whole thing once more. How to maintain,wrap, shower a child and so on. And now I'm presently 17 weeks pregnant and my son might be beneath two yrs while this child is born so I'm hoping he is taking it as good as his older sister did. He is aware of there is a child in my stomach (thinks he has one too, lol) and sorta knows the way to maintain a child, however then throws the teddy at the flooring, so I'm hoping he wont do this with the brand new child :-) I thinks its predominant to provide an explanation for safely whats occurring whilst your pregnant and make a tremendous deal of them being a BIG brother or sister and its their child as good now not simply mummy's. They won't realise the whole thing however they get the concept after a whilst. And making definite they nonetheless consider distinctive after the child arrives is first-class. That manner they do not consider driven apart. Hope I was once a few aid, I recognize I went on eternally so forgive me. But I consider you wanted the entire tale. Good Luck with all of it :-)

  • 1 decade ago

    No harm at all. Try not to let it get TOO filthy!

    Glad everything's working out.

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