please help me my heart is broken?

Question

my girlfriend of 6 years has recently left me and the pain is unbearable. We have been living together now for appx 5 years and did absolutley everything together.their is a 14 year age differance between us but our friends and family didnt care as we were in love. we had the odd row but what relationship doesnt. this time last year we had a really big row where it came out that i was too controlling and have to admit get slighly jealous at times. i have to add that she is the most beautiful loving affectionate caring girl in the world. anyway we remained together because we both loved each other, however instead of trying to fix my faults i merely brushed them under the carpet.Massive mistake.
She has recently gone to stay at her dads as we had the same big row and said she needed time and space to think. About 2 months ago we both decided to try for a baby, we also went on holiday everything was perfect or so thought.she decided to go back on the pill as she wasnt ready for a baby and only agreed as she knew i wanted one.
this was an issue for me and the row ensued, again controlling and jealousy.
we both work v hard but although she was affectionate i didnt show her enough attention and neglected my duties as a loving caring boyfriend constantly v tired. ther were times when she tried to show me attention but i would shrug her off as i was tired.
she has tried to live for a year hiding her feelings of my rejections and me not addressing my possesivness.
she says she still loves me but feels old before her time, now i realise how serious my faults are i want to change them but she says she thinks its to late as her priorities have changed. 
i still love her so much that it literally hurts, not eating properly, not sleeping. i miss her so much its unbearable and am constantly crying. i dont have many people i can turn to for help and am utterly dreading spending christmas without my angel.
i know they say time is a great healer blah blah blah but i love and miss her so much its hard to breathe. she really is my soulmate and ive lost her through my own insecurities.
someone please help, my heart is completely broken and i just cant see any way forward and dont know how to cope without my angel...........

pictureshygirl · Accepted Answer

It does not have to be over. Your relationship with her had mistakes made I am sure by the both of you. She now says she feels it is too late to make it work. What this means is that she has lost hope. It does not mean she no longer loves you. The love is still there. One cannot turn love off like you turn off a faucet of water.  You now have to convnice her by your actions that you are willing to change. This means leaving her alone. She needs to be convinced that you will not longer smother her with  your insecurities. I know this will be difficult for you to do, but if you truly love her, then you want what is best for her. For now, work on your insecurities with a therapist. IYour actions will show her ;you are making an effort to change. Two people can love each other with all their heart, but without the knowledge on how to make love sustain itself it will not last on its own. A couple in love needs to always learn day by day how to grow in love together. Unfortuanately you realize this a little late but at least you have acknowledged your mistakes and this is a huge plus. I know for now it seems hopeless, but it is not. She just needs the time to be convinced that you and her will make it.  There are websites you can look under for dealing with a broken heart. For now surround yourself with others who care. My hearrt goes out to you, you sound like a guy who loves deeply and this is so enduring. You are special and she knows this, she is just discouraged for now. Good luck and don't lose hope.

miss queeny · Answer

MANY SAY TIME IS A GREAT HEALER HOWEVER IM NOT A BELIEVER OF THAT...  i know exactly how you feel FIGHT for her if you really love her dont give up on what you had or could have feelings are such strange things you carnt just turn them off even if you wanted to if you could i would of done years ago :( so as a result shel obviously still love you!! its better to do things and regret them rather then not and regreting not doing them.... after all what have you got to lose now you can only gain and get her back   GOOD LUCK PAL!!

David · Answer

Johny,, i feel your pain I'm going through a similar situation the  difference is i have 3 children and she is not letting me see them, aged 4, 5, 7 tough going for all of us this time of year,
  My advice to you is the as your  first reply, DONT GIVE UP ON HER JUST YET, go win her back.
In the event you do not get back together at least you can say you tried all,,,

RishebhKumar · Answer

I understand you don't feel you are alone and unwanted things happens in life but i would suggest you to confront her and say her that you love her more than any thing but it just that you didn't showed it to her but you really care for her and missing her badly.Since now you have realised your mistake i think she will understand you and will forgive you and you Yes YOU Be Strong and never lose hope.
World is a wonderful place to live and i will be there to help you if you wish.
Do let me know what she said till then i will pray to god.
May God Bless!!!!

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please help me my heart is broken?

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