Would you feel this way (please answer SERIOUS QUESTION)?

Well today i found out a boy i wanted to be friends with killed himself. And i mean he was soo cute and i always say him but i never said anything. Thrusday i couldnt stop thinkin about him like should i like him or should i get over him because i already liked someone else. But then i find out that yesturday he killed himself. Like i mean i feel guilty because i always seen him and at first he was smiling then over the last couple of months he just always covered his head with his sweat shirt. I feel like I let time pass because he was right there and i never said anything thing like i mean RIGHT THERE next to me. Should I feel some way? What would you do in this situation? Like i dnt wanna cry but the thought of not seeing him after school, in school, anywhere makes me sick. Why would he do it and he looked soo super cool?