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How do you know when you're ready to move in with a boyfriend?
Okay, me and my boyfriend have been together on and off for 5 years now. We're both 23, I'm still living at home right now, he's living with his parents for a few more months, and he's lived on his own for the past few years by the way. He want's me to move to a city about 30 minutes away from here, but I'm not ready to move out yet. I thought I wasn't ready, but a friend brought to my attention that maybe I'm just scared to move out. Which is true. When he was living on his own I was over there almost everyday, and I see how it would be to live with him. It would work out. We've talked about moving in together in the future, and talked about similar things that we want to do in the future. But I didn't know he wanted to live together this soon. But I'm not sure if I should take the risk in a few months, or wait till I'm ready. But then again what if I never feel that I'm ready, should I just move out anyway? Cause he's kinda mad that I don't wanna move in with him yet, I don't know what to do...Any suggestions, opinions? Thanks for any responses!
2 Answers
- 1 decade ago
You have to do whatever you feel comfortable with. However, in my opinion, it's a good experience. Moving in sometimes does bring up issues in couples, but since you've already been around him so much, you probably already know some of the hurdles that you'll have to clear. Time is almost irrelevant, as it varies from each relationship. My bf and I were only dating maybe 4 or 5 months before we moved in together. Sudden, I know, but it made financial sense for both of us, and we do pretty much everything together already, and I no longer have to commute to my college. We've now lived together approaching 1 year, and although things may change, it has been a good experience. Do keep in mind that it all depends on if you're comfortable with the idea of being together that much more (if you're definitely not comfortable, it won't work out). It may strengthen your relationship, too. I like to take the occasional risk, and let it be a learning experience. This may be a good time for you to do the same.
My bf proposed that we move in together even earlier (after maybe 3 months O.o), and I initially said no, and continued to commute to school. I was worried about it hurting our relationship, or about it bringing up financial drama or anything involving where I would live. I talked to him about my concerns, and we set some agreements which made me comfortable enough to take the commitment of moving in.
Good luck!