Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

WOMEN ONLY Need advice: should I try to make contact after a week or so or wait for her and what should I do?

Together 8 months total with a break up prior over same emotional issues I had before about opening up when it's hard for me to do when I feel emotionally compromised. She broke up with me 2 months ago and i tried desperately to get her to come back. And last weekend I got the rest of my stuff from her house. For the last 2 weeks before I got my things I had started talking to her less cuz it felt like I was pushing her further away.

When I got my things I wanted to make the atmosphere light and quick. She let me reconnect her dryer. As I was about to leave I thanked her for helping me and gave her a drawing I made for her. She didn't look at it while I was there. So I told her I was sorry about things. The she sat down outside with me and we chatted for a moment. Not sure if I did more harm then good. But in the chat I told her I wouldn't promise I'd be everything she wanted but I would give my all. She said oh really and explained she never expected me too but just be open about my feelings instead of containing them so she could help me with protecting my feelings and quit holding things in.

Later that day her daughter text me why we wasn't getting married. Then my ex text me and told me she was sorry that her daughter text me. Then she proceeded to tell me how aggravated she was with me for making her think about things and that she didn't want to do that and didn't want to care.

Next day she text me and asked if I wanted the engagement ring back and I said no that whether the ring has meaning to her or not that it was her's and that I hoped we could make it have meaning again. She said "O" and "Thanks" then said she didn't want that. And started telling me things that wasn't an issue in our relationship before and made them an issue as if to FIND ways to justify how she is feeling right now.

Plus I find it strange that ALL. My things were ready to go except the engagement ring.

Update:

It sounds like she is needing more time and a lot of space now and I haven't contacted her since what texts she's initiated over the past weekend. Oh yeah she still has my dad on fb and has told him a few weeks ago that she has thought about me but it's hard to imagine thinking of me when I bother her trying to get her back.

1 Answer

Relevance
  • ?
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's very frustrating when you date someone who refuses to open up emotionally and this obviously got to her. She has a right to be happy in her relationship and not constantly battling with you for you to open up. It shouldn't be so hard, not on her part anyway. What she saw for your future was this constant slog for you to let her in and that's hard for someone to accept. But she broke up with you for a reason and now, after having a rationale comversation with you after some time apart, you being nice and open on this ONE dat has allowed a little doubt to settle in. There is no guarantee she wants you back, but she might be wondering if she made a mistake because maybe you were different and this is why she is aggravated. It is probably just a fleeting thought, a moment of doubt. You talked more freely and opened up, because this relationship was clearly important to you and after the break up it gave you some harsh truths to face up to so she noticed that difference, but she is also thinking there is no guarantee you want to be the kind of person who trusts her enough to open up, so why go back and risk it.

    Move on and let her go and focus on working on yourself so that the next relationship will be deeper and you can work on opening up more. Your girlfriend/partner/wife should be the one person you know you can trust to share your feelings. Of course she thinks about you, she clearly still has feelings, but she did what was best for her.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.