terrible twos ...melt downs...help?

My boy turned two a few days ago but has been acting like this for a while.

I try to distract him for the most part, with something else that he might be interested in. If he is going ballastic over something I have said no to, sometimes I will ignore him and maybe go into the other room. Then if it is over, right away I'll try to do an activity with him or read a story. So he knows there are no "hard feelings."

Sometimes if I'm really tired, the melt downs are difficult to handle. I think the best advice is to remain patient. Even if it takes leaving the room. If you start yelling or overreacting, it makes the situation worse, and then you feel worse about it as well.

Sometimes I'll try to empathize with him by saying stuff like "I know you are frustrated because you want to XYZ, but mommy said no. Let's read Curious George"

Try to remember, which IS HARD, that it is not the kid talking, but their overwhelming frustration at not being able to control their environment, to express themselves, etc.

Also watch if the baby is over tired. My son breaks down more when he is tired. Or, even when he is hungry.

I try to feed him every few hours, or else I notice he gets more cranky!

Good patience!!

My son has some serious melt downs sometimes... they are few and far between but they can be bad. Typically if I just go about my business and ignore him, he will quit within a minute or two. Or I try to distract him with something. For example, if he wants to play with something he is not supposed to and I take it away, I try to replace it with something else he is allowed to play with. 9 times out of 10 he wants the TV remotes... so I just say to him "NO Mason, we don't play with these... you can play with this toy though" Ignoring or redirecting to something else works wonders.

If they are just throwing a tantrum, we just say "that is not how we get what we want, come back when your ready to talk like a big girl/boy" and walk away, we dont look at or talk to them until they have stopped and use their words. If they do something during their tantrum that is against the rules, like hit or call names or say something disrespectful or break something, they get a punishment, carrying from a timeout to something taken away to a swat on the butt or hand. They learn pretty quick.

ignore them. If they are big I put her in the corner until she cools down. Sometimes I have to give her a hug and help her calm down but I never give in and give her the thing she is having the melt down about.

Now that she is getting older its getting easier to talk her out of having a melt down. For example the other day she decided to throw a tanty because she wanted to carry on playing with her dolls house instead of going to bed so I said "if your going to act like that the dolls house might have to be put away in the garage for a while". That soon shut her up and she went and put her jarmies on. But being able to get her to snap out of it with threats like that is only just starting to work now, I wouldnt do that with a younger toddler who really cant control their emotions. My princess is getting to the age where she can control herself but likes to play things up.

Try to ignore them if possible, explain (simply) why he/she cant have/do whatever the meltdown is about. Put him/her somewhere safe (bed) if its a big one. i find the most important thing is to not remain angry/cranky once the meltdown is over, and try to redirect his/her attention to another task/game/thing you want him/her to do.

good luck, and it does get better, my son is now almost four and relatively easy to talk out of a tantrum and easier to reason with.

:)

Say:

"I can't hear you when you're crying. Talk like a big boy/girl."

"Screaming doesn't get your way. If you want to do that, go to your room." (Then put them in their room)

Mostly, you just have to ride it out.