do you need to have discussed with someone rather than presume u r in a relationship?

ok so say you have met someone on eharmony and have been seeing them every few weeks cos they live a few hours away. you have been agreeing with family when they say you are just friends and he has a wife that died so until hes ready to tell people about the situation you need to be a bit careful about your feelings.

say they saw each other at the weekend and he had told his children about you and you came home and was telling your children you were in a relationship with him and have been for a while even though it's not been discussed. as she has put it it has just been presumed by both that they are in a relationship but as i said, neither of them have said to each other 'we are now going out then'.

i think she needs to just ask him or say are we going out now but she doesn't think she needs to. but surely he could turn round and say they are just friends if it isn't brought up and she'd be hurt even more.

me and my bf, i asked if on my birthday about making it official, until that point we were seeing each other but not 'in a relationship'.