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My daughter HATES uni and wants to switch.?

I took my daughter down to university last weekend, and she's struggling with being so far away from home. He course hasn't even started yet, but she's desperately homesick and talking about wanting to transfer to a closer to hone uni - or if thats not possible dropping out completely.

My question is, is it possible to change universities (supposing there are any which have vacancies!), and how would she go about it?

Update:

It's not my decision for her to quit - it's hers and as an adult I can't tell her what to do but can only support her with the decisions she makes.

I have asked her if she thinks that she should give it a better chance and that the homesickness will pass, but she's adamant that she's not staying there. She's certainly not clinging to me as she didn't live with me anyway.

She had these doubts BEFORE she received her A Level results, and said that she wasn't sure whether uni was the right course or whether she would be better off getting out into the world and working instead.

By now she has checked Clearing and there are no Psychology places available anyway, but she's made the decision that she still wants to quit, and has already started applying for apprenticeships.

This has been her decision, certainly not mine, what's the point in accruing so much debt so soon, and nothing to show!

6 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    She should quit immediately.

    Let her loose after helping her find a job in a nearby fish & chips shop.

  • 10 years ago

    It is *normal* for her to feel homesick at this point in the year. How she feels is absolutely, completely normal. Sometimes, just knowing that can make her feel a bit better, so make sure she knows. These feelings are particularly intense at first, and can be worst in the time when the course hasn't started, and she's not fully integrated into uni life yet. If things get very bad for her, she can talk to a counsellor in student health services, and of course, to you.

    She needs to give this place more than just a week. She should try to make this uni work for her. She should go to the fresher's fair, and join clubs and activities that interest her, and then *really* participate in them. Volunteer to do the stuff they need done. Ideally, at least one of those activities will be one that requires her to spend a ton of time around the same people in a very short period of time - for example, theater, band, crew or another sport. These require long hours, and by being around the same people, with the same interests as her, a lot, she'll have a chance to form friendships.

    Another thing she should do is *not* go home on weekends at first. She needs to be at the uni, so she can get integrated into the life there. A lot of homesick kids thing that going home on weekends would help them. The opposite happens. First, going home makes them feel worse, not better. Second, she'll miss out on the bulk of the social life at the uni, and the potential for friendships. So for the first 2-3 weekends, have her stay at the uni.

    If, at the end of the term (give the place 2-3 months), she still feels quite homesick, then she should try to find a place at another university that is closer to home. Distance from home is a completely reasonable thing to consider re: university choice; but at the same time, she picked this uni for a reason, and she should give the place a shot. If she does decide to change unis, she should talk to each one to see if they'd be willing to grant her some advanced standing for the work she's done at this uni.

  • 10 years ago

    It's a terribly new experience for your daughter and she will (understandably) be very homesick to begin with. There are many, MANY students who are feeling in the same boat as her. This is completely normal and part of becoming a new student, and I'm afraid the time to fly the nest will have to come at some point.

    I doubt she would be able to transfer to another University now, especially as the terms have now started. I would strongly suggest she stick it out for the first semester (dropping out now will mean that she will have to start in 2012 when the tuition fee rises), so she is now in that crucial year where you want to be at university before the fee rises. If she is still really unhappy, you can consider the option of transferring University. Do this the before the Xmas term begins, because it is still quite possible to change to another University, and enquire rather sooner than later. She can discuss it with her Academic Advisor who will be more than happy to be of help, and see what her options are.

    Really hope she becomes less homesick, meets a few people and makes some great friends! This will lessen her homesickness tremendously

    Source(s): Student
  • 10 years ago

    I just want to make this clear: Being homesick is FULLY normal. But do you honestly want her to cling to you forever? Would that be healthy for her?

    Now if you still want her to come close to home I will give you some advice: Once the semester starts you can't really switch her. You will have to wait until spring semester.

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  • 10 years ago

    Dont let her.

    She needs to fly the nest, everyone has this patch of being horribly home sick. It goes after 3 weeks. She will get used to it.

    I dont think she can change, by now all accommodation would be booked out and usually courses are booked out too.

    The uni she is at now will also charge her for the term still. So thats thousands wasted...

    Source(s): I moved away last year for Uni...was awful for the first 3-4 weeks because of home sickness...but it gets better.
  • TMas
    Lv 4
    10 years ago

    She might be able to talk to a counselor about it, but most likely she will run into some troubles with it being so close to school starting.

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