Opinions on the poem I recently wrote - break up?

Question

Severe Laceration 
I don't understand: The undertones in your voice/ the passive-agressive sighs/ the eyes that slowly roll down my frame when we never see eye to eye/ the long goodbyes/ treacherous times tying me to up-heaving arguments/ sleeping alone when i should be sleeping with you, just to exemplify sorry because i'm dearly in love with you; yet, I've forgotten how to make love to you/ trust issues dismissing the trace of our intertwined hearts/ complicated, tragic expressions of love when it's so simple: all i need is all of you because i've given all of me/ times i need you when it seems you don't need me/ being consumed with my own life, then you won't stop calling me/ the type to beg, i'm the type to forgive and move on/ forgetting about the times we've shared because the feeling's not there.
My love's still overrated, but your lust is overpriced- giving more than me, you giving half and asking for more.
speechless, 
i can't stand to argue anymore.
I can't love you so the memories and smiles are fading/ i can't love you so i pretend i never met you.
I do understand, i can't love you- so i'm leaving you.

Rosalinda · Accepted Answer

Hi. this is good and very touching, i like the picture words you painted, i like your words choices between the stanzas and your poetic persona is different and unique.  keep this up and keep on writing and sharing.

? · Answer

Yes very lovely, touching, and filled with love and charm. Sorry for the lack of Someone so close and expensive to You. Sounds like You have been very blessed to have the sort of uncommon Grandmother, and the sort of near and loving courting. Your writing may be very inspiration scary and profound. Your Grandmother will probably be very venerated. She is real consistently as close as Your center. Be definite and proportion Her reports with Your Children. If You should not have Children now, write them down in order that You can proportion them later. You have a present, please keep to proportion it with the World. It might use a tender soul with phrases that float of kindness. May God Bless You, and Your Family for the period of this time.......

Anonymous · Answer

"Break-up Operation (B.O.)" (a poem I wrote recently). "Break-up Operation (B.O.)" (a poem I wrote recently). 26 days ago 0 comments ...

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Opinions on the poem I recently wrote - break up?

3 Answers