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problem with coworker?
I work at a retail home improvement store. And I admit I screwed up to start with, but I think my co workers are taking things too far. A month ago we got a lot of new cashiers and this one(we'll call her Lazy) will not do her job she doesn't stay at the end of her aisle when without customers, shes constantly texting, and finds any excuse to run off when there isn't a supervisor around( which is often). A couple of weeks ago, I was having a really bad day and did something I NEVER DO, I asked one of the other cashiers (we'll call her 2face) Why Lazy thought that she didn't have to work like the rest of us. She said I don't know and we went on talking a while, then she started going down the list of cashiers asking what I thought of them. Of course, I said they were nice and do thier jobs. Over the next week or so Lazy got even lazier, and would go stand back in her aisle every chance she got. When I would make a face or apear frustrated, 2face would come over and talk to me ask me what was wrong. I gave the usual answer of "Why does she think she doesn't have to work". Each time I said this Lazy would come up behind us and say things like u talkin smack about me? A couple of times I was angry enough to say yes. But she didn't ask what I was sayin and I changed the subject. For all my dislike, I was always nice to her and tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, but 2face kept on goading and goading. She kept trying to get me to say things about the other girls and even though I didn't say anything bad about them, I get the feeling that someone told them I did. 2face even went so far as to ask me if I was a good fighter, which I am. I finally put 2 and 2 together and realized that 2face has been texting everything I say (and maybe more) to Lazy and they've been playing games with me this whole time. I strongly suspect shes been telling others that I have said things about them when I havent and that they are possibly trying to get me to say something about another girl so she will fight me because Lazy is obviously to small to do such. Now there is another girl, whom 2face is always saying horrible things about(call her innocent). Now Ive never been good about social interactions, I've had a hard life and little time for social graces. I'm much older than these girls and am not into playing games. If some one had done what I did to Lazy. I would have defended my friend or said "Hey, lazy do you hear what this girl is saying about you" So I just don't know what to do next. Should I:
A.) Apologize to Lazy for the first insult, explaining that I don't normally badmouth people. Explain to her that her actions and 2face's goading caused the subsequent insults.
B.) Do everything in A.) above plus wait for 2face to say something bad about innocent, and then tell innocent exactly what she said right in front of her and explain to 2face that that is the way to handle such a situation.
C.) Tell my manager what is going on before I explode and lose my job.
D.) other suggestions?
I swear I am not a trouble maker. I didn't report Lazy's Laziness to the manager or Lazy and 2face's constant texting. I don't like to get people in trouble. I have been treated very badly when I first came to work here. New cashiers were seen as a game to be played. Most of those people are gone now because they got themselves in trouble. I never reported any of it. But I can't just go on and ignore this I have to do SOMETHING or I feel I will lose my mind. I have already missed 2days work because I've made myself sick with worry. Please help. And be kind, like I said I never badmouth people, I just slipped up this one time and I know what I did was wrong but I can't change that
1 Answer
- 10 years agoFavorite Answer
If I were you, I'd do the following:
1. Calm down. Things like this happen to most of us at work: people are difficult creatures to deal with, and some of them, like 2Face are much more difficult than others.
2. Re-think the situation. What are the dangers (losing your job, people boycotting you), what are your priorities here (to save your job, to appear as a nice person, etc.)
3. Do not apologize to anyone. That has never helped in situations like this: what is said, is said. Do not apologize to Lazy, she is still lazy, isn't she, so what has changed? Do not start another round of gossip by telling Innocent what 2Face said about her, it's a vicious circle, and if 2Face told people you said bad things about them, such actions would only confirm her words.
4. If you think your manager can understand your problem in that situation, bring that up to him/her. But before doing so think what he/she can possibly do about that and what you would gain. Think what you want him/her to do for you and present the problem from that angle. For example, if you want him/her to fire 2Face, say that you believe that she seriously undermines the team spirit and teamwork, hence the effectiveness of the work and customer service, by spreading gossip about cashiers. If you want Lazy to leave, then tell the manager she doesn't do her work properly, but be very specific, preferably with examples. You get the point.
5. Try to fix your relationship with other cashiers if you think it was affected by whatever 2Face allegedly told them about you. Be nice to them, continue like nothing happened.
That's pretty much all you can do for now. Just my thoughts.