how would you make a relationship like this work?.....religion?

Question

Met this girl I really like and been talkin for a few months. Were gettin a little more to the point where its a serious relationship and everything is almost perfect between us except for one thing. She believes in god and wants strongly to have a partner that also does. Im not saying I don't believe but i've never truly believed in god. The complicated part is I went to church every Sunday until I was 18 (now 21) and I loved the family oreinted environment it gives and the lifes lessons it teaches but I never truly believed. I stopped going but I still am the same person I was who believes in being honest, doing good for others, and living life to the fullest. I understand how she feels and I've let her know that I would support what she believes in and go to church with her if we really wanted to start a life together. Even if we had kids somewhere down the line I would gladly raise them in the church but she doesn't want me to go for her or anybody else, she wants me to go for me. If I cant truly believe in god is there any other way to make us work? I could and would love her to the end of the earth but I just dont want this to be a deal breaker

Nancy · Accepted Answer

Sounds like you two will be having some very deep, intellectual conversations in the near future.  First - you have to figure out why you think you don't believe, figure out what you *do* believe - and go from there.  Being force fed organized religion all your life doesn't make you Godly.. Knowing your heart and feeling a connection to the Divine, does.

Anonymous · Answer

Oh dear! I'm 21 soon and the guy I love is atheist, and he we want to get married. He tells me he will go to the mosque with me n what not, but we cannot work clearly. Now he is trying to learn about Islam, if he does not grow to believe for himself, we will just end up being friends..but you are a different story, you seem to accept christianty you just don't believe. It's not a big deal, you can make it work. My friend doesn't even want to raise our children the way I want. I think you are offering her a lot, if it's not enough for her, you must know when to let things go..

Katlady · Answer

I think religion is a deal breaker.  I'm an atheist and thank whatever my bf is.  I do feel the same way you do about church-it's good and family oriented, but you gotta hear that nonsense too.  Since neither of you will change, I hate to say it but the relationship probably won't survive this serious difference.

Anonymous · Answer

As long as you share the same values, I think it is possible to make a relationship work.  But if your disbelief in God is a dealbreaker for her, I really think you should move on.

Maria · Answer

It will create problems for you in future so try to avoid this decision. But it is possible if you have 100% level of understanding

badger180 · Answer

Keep talking to her and come up with a solution that works for the both of you

Anonymous · Answer

trust me, you do not want to marry a churchie girl. she will drag your *** to church every single sunday for the rest of your life. community and life lessons get old. fast.

Afro · Answer

If you don't believe, then you don't. She can't change that and she'll have to accept it.

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how would you make a relationship like this work?.....religion?

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