porn and relationships?

Wow regulating another human beings behavior in a relationship...not good. For instance my gf has way more porn material than i ever owned. We dont look at it that much and we enjoy lookiing/watching. Telling your boyfriend that your insecure in a mordern world where there is admitedly too much of the stuff shows him that he cannot trust you to accept his basic persona. Have you stopped and thought about the fact that he hasnt raised a much more serious question about your relationship that you seem to govern and that is telling him to be different than he is. And honestly your sex life would probably benefit. Porn can be a powerful weapon or something enjoyed once in a while. Personally im quite bored with it. Let it be he will develope into something better than you assume and give him the self respect to mature. He is what he is and if you stiffle his urges he hasnt matured about yet he wont and it will be a thorn in your side. faltering has already occured by both of you us your common sense and fix this before it fixes both of you. if he is spunking off all of the time there are other problems seek councelling

i at the instant started relationship a guy that loves porn and that i know what you're coping with. It makes you experience like he's no longer became on adequate with you so he has to observe different ladies to get became on. some adult males are basically this style and you will the two connect in with the porn or you had extra valuable discover yet another guy that's no longer into porn. it is quite complicated and that i'm additionally having a no longer basic time with it and attempt to appreciate it with him yet its no longer the comparable for me. i could relatively look at him than all and sundry else yet I dont prefer to lose him the two so i assume i will take care of the porn because of the fact he ability that plenty to me.

Your real issue here is with your boyfriend lying to you. Us women place far more value on trust that the majority of men do so you're certainly not alone in feeling that he's betrayed you because, in fact, he has to a certain extent.

Having said that, I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss his porn viewing. While you realize that it's not so much about him looking at porn as much as him lying about it that hurts you, understand that even if/when he wins back your trust, you'll always be wondering if he's looking at porn behind your back. This happened to me as my ex-husband, as it turned out, was addicted to Internet porn for a long time without me knowing anything until one day I accidentally found a "dirty" site he was looking at when I came home from work early. After that, no matter how strongly he insisted that it was a one-time thing, I didn't trust him and I even resorted to paying $20 for a service (http://findhisporn.com)/ which found and printed out a list of all the porn sites he was looking at when I wasn't around. Yes, I know it was a form of spying on him but at least I knew for sure.

If this helps, I recommend a webpage written by Dr. Phil (http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/54) which lists all the reason why a woman has every right to demand that her significant other not look at pornography, especially if it's done behind her back.

I hope this helps.

When I first found my husband looking at porn, it devastated me. And I didn't get it because he wasn't having sex with me at the time; in fact, he was downright refusing me. I thought the tears and the I'm sorry, it'll never happen agains would be the end of it...but then I grew up a little and realized that porn is just something that men seek. They're visual creatures. They like sex, they like naked women, and they like the fantasy that those things or those girls could really happen for them. Here's the thing, most of the women who appear in videos or pictures are there by choice; so, if they are okay with being degraded, then who are we to judge? Perhaps the argument of degradation is more of an insecurity on your part? Sometimes, it's best to choose your battles and, speaking from experience, this is NOT one you are going to win. He's still going to look at porn; he'll just start hiding it from you and eventually your belief in him will dwindle. Maybe you could look at couples vidoes? I did with my husband and I found it to be wildly erotic. We had a lot of fun with it. Bottom line, if you start treating him like a child and restricting who he is, you're going to get the rebelious and deceitful teen you've asked for. Open up your mind...this could be fun! : ) Good luck!

He lied to save face so you wouldn't be upset. He just did what most men do...you just happened to catch on. Oh well.

It's porn. It's normal for men to view it in some form or another. If it isn't affecting your sex life - let it go...you aren't his mother and it's not for you to "control" this.

Most women make it such a big issue that guys hide it...so stop making it an issue or find a new boyfriend that doesn't view porn (good luck with that).

Hate to say this but he is going to continue to look at it unless he becomes holier than thou and still he will probably still look at it. You making a big deal out of it makes you look insecure to him. You feel the need to control and that is just not going to work. You sound young. I have been young once and felt the same way as you. I now see men differently then what I use to. They are visual creatures who get bored with the same eye candy. Some get bored and find another woman. Your boyfriend will continue to look in fact he will become sneakier and sneakier but us women still out smart them lol. If he is addicted to porn and is looking at it everyday all day then my suggestion to you is to suggest he gets help or you are going to leave. If he is just looking at it every once in awhile let it be and leave him alone there is really nothing you can do about it. You are not the only person he is going to look at sexually for the rest of his life.

You should follow through with him. Unlike a woman, a man can't get tonnes of these little sensual orgasms every turn he rubs below. Men need to be visually stimulated and porn can help with this if libido is poor. It really isn't all that bad as it seems and is generally accepted in modern society. You can join him in the bathroom with the mobile if you like? That's what I do with my bisexual girl.

I understand how you feel. Its hurtful knowing someone you love likes porn or looking at other women naked. Do not nag him about it, you do not want him to stop confiding in you. I don't know if you believe in God, but if you want him to truly stop, you should start praying for him. There's lots of temptation out there- beautiful women, half dressed women, women who would give him some in a second, etc., you need a higher power on your side to help him avoid falling for any of these things. good luck!

ok, not to be the bad girl here

but you really do need to grow up on this one

men are men

they like naked women

not you, not jesus, not anything is going to keep them from looking at the naked female body

demeaning?

i will never understand this when women say it and I am a woman

.is it truly hurting you? or do you have low self esteem?

again not trying to be rude, dont take it that way

but getting men not to look at " T and A" is like trying to get a dog not to lick himself..they just cant help it

grow up and get over it sister or you will be hunting for men your whole life

even gay men look at porn...sheesh

You simply cannot ask someone to make a morality change like that. You will either have to accept that he likes porn or find a guy who has a VERY low sex drive.

I don't know of one man that doesn't look at porn. Not one.