Just a random quick question, preferably for men?

Question

My fiance and I were having an interesting conversation earlier. He said that if I were to hypothetically go to a bar/club and make out with some other woman (one time thing, didn't mean anything, etc.) he wouldn't care. I asked him what made that any different than if I were to be in the exact same situation except kiss a man instead of a woman. We agreed that either way, it's being unfaithful. But he couldn't give me a straight answer as to why it wouldn't really bother him if I were to make out with  a woman instead of a man. He eventually came to the conclusion that he wouldn't feel particularly threatened if it were a woman, but that another man in that situation is competition and he would be afraid of losing me.
I asked a couple guys I work with the same question and they basically agreed with what my fiance said, although one of them added the only reason he'd be upset is that he wasn't invited to watch haha.

So, just out of curiosity, how does everyone feel about this kind of situation? How is it different? Is it different to you? Would you be bothered?

davester1970 · Accepted Answer

Cheating is cheating whether you are cheating with another man or a woman.  I would be quite upset if a woman I am dating were to go somewhere and kiss on another woman just as equally if she was kissing a guy.  Call me old fashioned or overly conservative if you must, but if she wants to be in a relationship with me, then I am the only person she should be kissing or doing anything sexual with.  I would be upset with her for going to a bar, club or any drinking establishment since I don't drink much anymore.  Any woman I am going to be involved with better be a light to non-drinker as well.

I would be extra special livid at her if she is smooching on anyone that is not me if we are supposedly going to be married like you and your fiance.  This would bring back a lot of raw memories for me.  Sixteen years ago I was engaged to be married, but broke it off because I caught her cheating on me.  Granted, it was with another man she cheated on me with.  It still doesn't change the fact that cheating is cheating.  If she wants me to be faithful to her, then she needs to do the same thing to me.  How would you like it if your guy is cheating on you with another man?  

Besides, if a woman I am with is smooching and making out with other women, then I would have to assume she has homosexual tendencies.  The last thing I would want to marry or spend long-term with is a woman who is lesbian or bi-sexual.  After all, if a woman can have sexual attraction to another woman one way or another, then I would have to assume that she doesn't love me mind, body and soul that as a man I deserve from a potential spouse.

Anonymous · Answer

I agree , if you would have kissed a man , I would of seen it as cheating , but a wan is not as threathning and it wouldn't been more of a girls night of , having fun thing . Strange if you think about it I guess but if he was to go out and kiss a girl , you wouldn't be happy , but if he kissed a guy, you would be confused and concerned but not threatened . Hope I helped

MR HENRY S · Answer

This guy has some weird thoughts. Think long and hard before you marry him.

? · Answer

my bf said the same thing. . . he said if i was bi it would be a different story lol

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Just a random quick question, preferably for men?

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