Do we have a right to be upset?

You have 3 kids. That's quite a lot for older people to care for. How old are these children and how independent are they? I loved having one grandchild over, but I am finding it more difficult to have both of them, now that there are two. Your brother in law only has one, so it's easier for them to take care of him. As for the money, people make money decisions on their own criteria. Maybe they think the younger brother needs help more, or maybe they're making up for not giving him as much growing up. In any case, it's pretty petty to worry about that. They are family, and they love your children. Having all three of them overnight twice in 18 months is pretty good. My mother announced when we had children that she was not a baby sitter- she had done her child rearing. I never resented that- I was capable of paying a baby sitter, and then spending time with my parents without treating them like servants.

If your children are being treated differently, of course you have all the right to be upset, as a parent, it is obvious that you would be upset if they were treating your children unfairly. You should talk it out with them, and if they won't take care of your children, they probably have a good reason for it. Instead of begging, try hiring a babysitter. There are a lot of responsible babysitters who are willing to help ^^ don't mind your brother in law and his wife, if they choose to live such way, who can't pay their own bills, wastes money on bars every weekend, and who aren't even responsible to take care of their kid, you know they won't last long. Maybe in your in laws point of view, they think the younger brother in law needs as much support as possible, because it clearly shows he's not wise enough to raise his own child and a family. I hope you took no offense to what I wrote, but I agree that you can be upset. If they aren't willing to help you guys out, try finding another way without their help! Don't end up like your youngest in law who depends on them to keep his family!

In laws aren't automatic free babysitters.

No, why would u be sas if they dont or cant watch ur kids...? I understand that u might think they get treated differently but the bikls and u putting ur brother in law bad is wrong they ur kids anyway if they cant watch them have ur mom or sister watch tgem why the ur inlaws!? especially if u have to beg i wouldnt ask more than one time if thwy dont want my kids its their lost! But i wouldn't be getting all mad pitting the others down...