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boyfriend's perfect..... except..... ?
We've been dating 8 months. I used to be a bit clingy according to my exes, but with this one, he doesn't see me being clingy. Still, I'm sure to back off and give him a ton of space constantly. My only problem with the relationship is that I think I care a bit too much about meeting the people in his life... It's been 8 months and I only just met his bestfriend.... My friends and family find it weird too, and I've brought it up to him, he knows it's upset me... this guy is perfect for me except for this one stupid little thing (and it's really only in existance because he's never brought someone home before at all)... I've given him in my mind till our anniversary, and then on that day, it's bring me to meet them or we're done...
I've brought this issue up many times to the point that now I feel like the nagging gf; 6 times total over the past 4 months. He doesn't fight me on it, he just gives me excuses. I guess this is more of a vomit-post because I can't do anything about it but wait, but do you think that I've made the right decision here? Or am I being a godzilla of a girlfriend?
Some additional deets: He talks about marriage and kids as often as me (and usually before I even open my mouth). He talks about the future all the time, continuously treats me well and loves me fully. He texts me more often than I text him, and he was the first one to say "we are so perfect for each other". I know what it's like to have been duped into believing that a guy loves me; there is no way in hell that this guy is faking on me. I am also pregnant at the moment and will be getting an abortion (which he knew about me since day 7 in terms of how I view it all), and he has offered to take me to every single one of my appointments and has even said "If only it were ten years from now." Sorry, but the guy loves me (or I'll even give it to you, thinks he loves me).
He is not ashamed of his family; he is the type of guy who will jump to do anything for anyone close in his life; his parents say jump, and he says how high. lol. It's something that I
*****Some additional deets: He talks about marriage and kids as often as me (and usually before I even open my mouth). He talks about the future all the time, continuously treats me well and loves me fully. He texts me more often than I text him, and he was the first one to say "we are so perfect for each other". I know what it's like to have been duped into believing that a guy loves me; there is no way in hell that this guy is faking on me. I am also pregnant at the moment and will be getting an abortion (which he knew about me since day 7 in terms of how I view it all), and he has offered to take me to every single one of my appointments and has even said "If only it were ten years from now." Sorry, but the guy loves me (or I'll even give it to you, thinks he loves me).
*****He is not ashamed of his family; he is the type of guy who will jump to do anything for anyone close in his life; his parents say jump, and he says how high. lol. It's something
*****Some additional deets: He talks about marriage and kids as often as me (and usually before I even open my mouth). He talks about the future all the time, continuously treats me well and loves me fully. He texts me more often than I text him, and he was the first one to say "we are so perfect for each other". I know what it's like to have been duped into believing that a guy loves me; there is no way in hell that this guy is faking on me. I am also pregnant at the moment and will be getting an abortion (which he knew about me since day 7 in terms of how I view it all), and he has offered to take me to every single one of my appointments and has even said "If only it were ten years from now." Sorry, but the guy loves me (or I'll even give it to you, thinks he loves me).
*****He is not ashamed of his family; he is the type of guy who will jump to do anything for anyone close in his life; his parents say jump, and he says how high. lol. It's something
*****Some additional deets: He talks about marriage and kids as often as me (and usually before I even open my mouth). He talks about the future all the time, continuously treats me well and loves me fully. He texts me more often than I text him, and he was the first one to say "we are so perfect for each other". I know what it's like to have been duped into believing that a guy loves me; there is no way in hell that this guy is faking on me. I am also pregnant at the moment and will be getting an abortion (which he knew about me since day 7 in terms of how I view it all), and he has offered to take me to every single one of my appointments and has even said "If only it were ten years from now." Sorry, but the guy loves me (or I'll even give it to you, thinks he loves me).
*****He is not ashamed of his family; he is the type of guy who will jump to do anything for anyone close in his life; his parents say jump, and he says how high. lol. It's something
****Jason, he's not in kindergarten, and he's actually very mature for his age (it's a big bonus), and we are both adults who talk about our issues; there are no secrets, no manipulations, or the like.
****This might help; reasons he has given: at first, too soon. Then: mom undergoing operations, doesn't want anyone to see her (fair enough, totally get). 6 months in: House is a mess because of mass restorations and his mom won't let anyone into the house. Now: His house has just finished these renovations, and I haven't brought it up to him in a few weeks; I'm waiting to see the "Okay, my house is done, come over for dinner" or whatever.
8 Answers
- 9 years agoFavorite Answer
Not at all I think it is perfectly normal to want to bring him into your circle, and to be accepted into his. You say you've been together 8 months and that means 4 more until your anniversary. Don't you think it will be harder for you to end things then? Personally I have had experience with someone who is detached with his friends and family and that makes it hard. Especially since it seems to be important to you. Why don't you say you want to throw a small dinner party where each of you invite a couple of friends? If he gets weird then maybe that's the time to stop asking questions and just walk the other way. In other words, get out then instead of waiting. Personally I never trust a guy who doesn't have friends. And if he does and he doesn't want you around them, then you don't need to be involved with him anymore.
- 9 years ago
Can you let go of asking him so many times?
If you are nagging, he won't like it, at all, as nobody likes hit.
Instead of focusing on his problem, focus on what you like about him. What do you appreciate about him?
This will help you shift out of negativity.
maybe he's just being overprotective because he cares for you a bit too much? (i.e. maybe he doesn't want his guy friends to be attracted to you?) Guys often do not like to admit they have problems to girls, since it can make them look weak.
Regardless, if you still want to meet some of his friends, think of fun creative ways that would motivate him to want to introduce you to his friends. If you ask him with a nagging voice, it won't work, but if you give him several compliments first, and then ask is a positive manner it would work far better. Something like this: "I would absolutely love it if I can meet some of your friends"
Or, you can write a letter to him, and express only all the wonderful things in your relationship, and include how much MORE wonderful it would be if you met his friends!
Positive persuasion works, but complaints rarely ever work, so again focus on what you appreciate and use it to your advantage (but of course only do what is best for both of you) :)
BTW, is he Asian? Introducing a woman to an Asian guy's family can often mean: "Mom, dad, this is the woman I intend to marry"
- 9 years ago
lol trust me you are over reacting most dudes dont like showing off thier GF to thier family and friends for a good reason
1. You get Teased
2. Your Friends talk about your GF as a tool
3. Mom likes to say things that she should not be saying
4 shy and Embarrassed to be honest
Source(s): From a dudes point a view We guys dont like to do that meet and greet thing it a girl think your fine just chill or your ganna make em break up with you - 9 years ago
Have you asked yourself why you need that so bad? A lot of guys don't really take girls home unless it's something super serious, I know my mom always tells me not to bring a guy home until it's for sure serious because she doesn't want to fall in love with him and then i break up with him.... so you never know what his family situation is like....
.... maybe he's embarrassed of his family or certain aspects and wants to make sure you really love him first?
Just wait... I think waiting til your anniversary is a good idea. Don't bring it up until AFTER y'alls anniversary day. Just in case it does annoy him.
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- Anonymous9 years ago
He might not be particularly close with his family.
I was with my boyfriend for nearly nine months and only met his parents once! I spoke to him about it and it turns out he barely speaks to his mum or dad. He always spent more time at mine as he got on with my family better than he did with his own family.
Down be down about it
Source(s): Experience - 9 years ago
8 months is a very long time. maybe he doesnt get on with them very well, or maybe he doesnt like you as much as you think you should really sit him down and ask him to tell you what is going on.
- Anonymous9 years ago
Maybe he is ashamed of his family. I am ashamed of mine.
