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Doc Watson asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 9 years ago

Was This Dumb Poem I Wrote Worth The Effort?

It was written a while ago as an exercise: one of those games where you’ve got x number of minutes to write something new. Most of the verse I’ve written over the years is free form where the last thing in the world I worry about is rhyming words in old-school form. That several of the early lines ending up rhyming was by accident. Then I decided they matched the tone of the poem. The point is: I don’t exactly dislike this poem but am not sure if it has any real creative merit worth being proud of? Your honest opinions are encouraged and welcomed.

LOVE AS ANTIMATTER

If I should write a poem, a frivolous endeavor

of emotional disdain, the implications would

suggest that the temperature in Hades has dropped below

thirty-two degrees and has held steady as it should.

If I were to write a poem, assuming sanity

had finally succumbed to it’s more staunch opponents,

casting a heart’s skepticism into the abyss,

it would be to trade a fool’s caution for a love’s kiss.

If I were to write a poem

it would imply that life as

I know it has run amok:

resistance is out of luck.

If I were to write a poem

if would be an ode to the

demise of a protective

nature exchanged for shared bliss.

(Yeah, I know the title sucks. It originally was simply called 'If...')

8 Answers

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Creative effort comes from the heart. Your self-criticism in using the adjective "dumb" isn't

    warranted, imho.

    My favorite stanza is the final one "...a protective nature exchanged for shared bliss".

    Wonderfully poetic.

    You may have just inspiried me to write a poem today!

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    5 out of 10

  • 9 years ago

    It's clever, even cute.

    I like what you've expressed.

    Here's a word of advice: Don't ever call something you've written "dumb." If it came from the heart or from your imagination or from something burning inside you it is never dumb. It is something you wanted to say and you wanted others to hear and read it.

    It's never dumb.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    It is good. Even if you write a poem you don't like, at least it is a way of expressing your feelings.

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  • 9 years ago

    Yeah, I think it was worth the time writing it. I don't know if it was worth the time putting it on yahoo! answers, lol. Keep up the good work.

  • 9 years ago

    Good poem :)

    Keep up the good work.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    I love it.

    I think If would be a great title.

    Many Blessings!

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    amazing.............! so say this poem do not show effort you done good job.

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