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? asked in Arts & HumanitiesBooks & Authors · 9 years ago

Doing a line edit for a friend and I got stuck on a sentence. Any ideas?

So, I was in the middle of this action scene I was line editing for a friend and I need a simile.

Their howls and snarls rolled towards them, along with the pounding of hefty paws. Teeth like well used bear traps clicked amid savage hunger, in the force of their rush. Then, behind these hounds, the shadows of the horrors to come were reviled.

“Bring em on! The more the merrier.” He brought forth teeth of his own.

“How can you stay so calm in the midst of all this, Pen?! Aren't you scared?” Leah almost sounded insulted, *as if somehow made inferior, because she had voiced her fear.--

* This is the line I need the simile for. "Leah almost sounded insulted, like a..."

Thanks you all very much!

1 Answer

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Leah seemed to take his courage as a personal slight.

    Oh, and it's 'revealed' not 'reviled'.

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