Why Are So Many Clueless About The Effects Of Child Abuse?

Because many don't understand that each abused person is an individual and their reactions to abuse can vary from one to another.

The reactions may depend on what actually happened, who abused them, how often and what their environment was like.

As for why some won't speak up as adults again that can be down to how, who, where and when they were abused and their responses.

Some don’t understand people at the ages of 18 - 21 can still be that person at 60+. Age doesn’t matter.

They may decide there is no point in talking especially if their environment is still much the same.

There are a million reasons why many adults won’t come forward, some taking it their graves. One may be that still to this day, they won’t be believed.

The ones who do talk, as in this Saville's case, should be listened to; it helps those who perhaps are not as brave.

Some of us do know the effects of child abuse. Some of us work in that field. We also know the effects of false accusations.

Most male teachers have been the subject of false accusations at one time or another. It's a form of control by their pupils. If "Sir" has upset them, they complain that they have been abused knowing that they will be listened to and there will be no comeback when the accusations cannot be proved.

As far a Savile is concerned, we need to await the outcome of the police and BBC investigations before we know whether any of the accusations can be substantiated. The man is dead and cannot defend himself against what has become a witch hunt by the gutter press. One substantiated accusation is enough to damn the man for ever. What we need to question is why 120 people have jumped on the bandwagon after a rather spiteful "exposé" in an ITV documentary. If Savile was a mass child rapist and groper as the accusations suggest, it's strange that they have all waited until now to come forward. It makes one wonder whether some of the accusations are based on the facts that

1) The dead can't sue for libel

2) There's little chance of being prosecuted for fraud or perverting the cause of justice

3) There's £20,000 a head on offer from the Criminal Injuries Compensation Board

Hah! You must not be a parent. Everyone says they'll never fight about money but they always do. Money unfortunatly is everything. The clothes you wear, the food that keeps you going, the place that keeps you warm. You want to make life last? Guess what- you'll need cash. Your parents say money isn't everything because there's a fine line between just wanting money and needing money and they dont want you to think money is the only thing to make you happy. Your parents fight when they Need money. You try spending thousands on necessities (house, food, clothes alone) a month,, while spending all your extra on your kids and then try not getting stressed out at times. How about you hit pay day then pick up 6 bills in the mail? Your parents are hypocritical? Get over it! Everyone is, even you at times. Stop putting so much pressure on your parents to be perfect, they're just people. A regular guy, a regular woman, doing thier best by you. Ps, if you've tried time outs, grounding, and taking away privileges for a child who refuses to listen what are you gonna do? Your telling me the options are A. give up on diclipine and say 'hitting is bad' or B. last resort spanking and tell your kids "its okay to slap people"

I can understand why they didn't come forwards at the time - the man was very famous and influential, and there was a culture of ignoring all sorts of abuse, including against children, across society. What I don't understand is why not a single one of over 100 alleged victims has come forwards in the 40 years since. You can argue that they wouldn't be believed as children, but they would have been taken seriously as adults, especially in the last 20 years when Saville was hardly at the height of his fame. I'm in my early 20s, and honestly I didn't know who Saville was until he died. He was no longer famous and influential, and claims against him would have been taken seriously.

People who have suffered child abuse react to it differently, but generally either you manage to move on with your life (in which case why bring it all up now, when it's going to do nothing to Saville now he's dead, and is only going to cause you more pain), or you don't (in which case you would have brought it up long before now). It just seems highly unlikely that over 100 people would be unable to speak out, as adults not just as children. That many of the claims have been made through the media, rather than to the police, is also very suspicious. Very few victims of crime want media attention, especially for something like child abuse, and even fewer would go to ITV before they went to the police. After all, if you're scared of going to the police because you won't be believed, why would you put yourself on TV in front of millions? It just doesn't add up.

And I have read books and academic articles by experts, and studied issues around child abuse, and I still don't think it adds up at all - what we're seeing isn't normal in terms of how those who have suffered abuse as children tend to behave, or how they tend to bring it up. Yes it's wrong to automatically assume all these claims are false, but it's just as wrong to do what you are doing, and assume all the claims are true before there has been any sort of due process.

Reading a paper on child abuse doesnt make you an expert. The only experts are the victims. There is a frightening amount of high profile paedophiles in this country, backed up by even higher paedophile pals. How this "ring" will ever be infiltrated I cant imagine, it seems the ring may outnumber the victims.

I think he was always careful enough to palm off the innocent cuddling of one child & cover the groping of another.

Children at the time probably DID say something, who would have believed them?

Children from children homes weren't believed about the abuse they were receiving from their parents/guardians/siblings!

Think we can see NO-ONE DID believe them until now when saviles hold died with him.

I was abused as a child and teenager. So was my mom. My mom was one of the people whom abused me. People don't know cause they don't understand. They are tied up in there own individuality forget we can all feel for each other. I forgive my abusers, but I don't talk to them. I tried reconnecting with my parents, but abusers don't change unless they want to put the effort in.

i know how a child feels after child abuse. its not something to be talked about. telling mum is out of the question because the child is the guilty one. i dont know why that is but it works. the child is scared.. the worst thing in my case was my mum asking me accusingly. "why didnt you tell me me?" which meant , to my 10 year old ears, that it was my fault for not telling her. ive never forgiven my mum for that.

I answered this question just now here: http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ao... in a question about Jimmy Savile.

The reason for all this ignorance is that we have been too wound up about the sex aspect of this (because of our own social taboos) without considering that the real damage is being done by the abuse of power.

This is why a pair of teenagers having illegal sex are not particularly harmed by the experience, and many childhood encounters can lead to very long and fulfilling marriages. Queen Elizabeth II herself fell in love with her future husband at the age of 13, although it is unlikely they were able to consummate their feelings until they were married. There is no abuse of power here - the couple are exploring their emerging sexuality on their own terms, and retain control over what is going on, only going as far as they feel ready.

Where there is an imbalance of power however, it is the duty and requirement for the more powerful party to take responsibility for the welfare of the weaker one. This applies as much to business relationships, political relationships and family relationships as it does to sexual ones. Neglect of this important principle will hurt someone, and in many cases, the harm is serious and could be life-threatening. I do fear that Jimmy Savile may have failed to uphold this duty, and allowed his own sexual urges to exploit his celebrity totally irresponsibly.

In this drive for 'striving' and 'aspiration' we seem to forget this duty, and get ourselves side-tracked on sexual titilation. I was appalled myself by Cameron's conference speech.

I did myself once fall in love with a 13-year-old girl who had a crush on me. I was 41. My response was not to dismiss the power of her sexual feelings, but to appreciate the overwhelming power of them in someone of that age, and hold back myself for her own good. Nor did I deny my own feelings, but to confront them and come to terms that, in order to uphold my belief in my duty as the more powerful party, I had to sacrifice expression of them until she was a lot older, and in a position to regard me as an equal.

My punishment for being foolish enough to confide with her parents (out of a misplaced sense of respect for them) was a police visit, and a campaign of hate from her father (who I suspect has been tipping off everyone I have worked for since) which has ruined my life. He is a bully, who enjoys abusing the power of this social taboo and this witch-hunting campaign against paedophiles, and I hate him and all those like him.

Those have been forgotten.

Luke 9:48 And said unto them, Whosoever receiveth this little child in my Name, receiveth me, and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth him that sent me; for he that is least among you all, he shall be great.