Advice and opinions needed. I am having a hard time relating to my sister in law?

Question

I hate to come across as insecure and while I want honesty here on Y!A, please don't totally flame me...especially when I get to the lame FB part! Thanks. I apologize for the length here as well.

My sister in law seems so cold to me. I have really tried to be there for her and attend any birthday parties, functions that she has for her children, her little jewelry and other various 'sales parties'. I make purchases and bring gifts. 

She is fairly friendly with me in public at these events, but it is the 'little things' that bother me. 

I have never had bad words with her, nor have I ever said anything bad that could have gotten back to her. I have always tried to be there for her, such as when they called us when their infant son passed away.

Now..to the FB part...She never acknowledges me on FB. She posted how much fun her kid's party was, and I responded saying it was fun and then went on to compliment the decor, food etc... I have thrown a comment here and there when she posted a few pictures. When her son was in a few of our wedding pictures I posted and commented  on how handsome he is. Not even a 'like' Not even one like on any of our wedding photos. I will comment on a post and she will just skip over me.  She posted on FB that she couldn't find a wreath for her son's grave and I went out and got her one, after I saw that no one else was helping. Their money was tight after the funeral (which we also gave a small contribution, and received no acknowledgement..it WAS received because it was handed to her) She had even posted that she was getting her Thank You cards sent out .

At her last child's party she was posting pictures of him posing with everyone's gifts but ours. I saw all the gifts AT the party, and not one of the 6 gifts we brought were posted. I didn't want my butt kissed, but I just feel slighted. Like I am not good enough.

I can't explain WHY this bothers me so much. I always thought that it would have been nice to have a sister in law I could be close to.  Has anyone else been in a similiar situation? Anyone have any advice or suggestions?  With the lack of a 'Thank you ' card. would you change the gift giving?Thank you!

I feel like I am done trying.

I should also add that there is no problem with the relationship with the brothers before his health issues. It is so frustrating. I have never run into anyone like her..EVER!

farina · Accepted Answer

It sounds like that she doesn't like you. maybe you remind he of someone. She may be jealous of your marriage,your family and she also sounds like a self centered bitcch. I can kinda understand the fb thing. i hateee when ppl never drop a comment and i se them commenting on other's posts. irks me bad! She is just rude to u. maybe because has a really unhappy personal life. I would just give it a rest. you did what you could. ball's in HER court ohhhhhh. how do you A) show up at a wedding without a gift and B) Not send a thank you note

? · Answer

Honey you're literally not playing this extremely wise. you want to make a chum of this lady because she may be the worst enemy you'll ever have if you're making an enemy of her. it really is her son's wedding ceremony and he or she does have a properly to favor to be in contact. no man or woman suggested you should hearken to what she exhibits even with the indisputable fact that it really is well mannered and far nicer to a minimum of once in a lengthy time period ask her suggestion even with in case you will get each and every thing out of your man or woman mom and grandmother. the point is your destiny mom in regulation gained't disappear once you get married. you should ought to attend to this lady so a lot more suitable than you imagine you'll and that's going to all be plenty smoother is she is your chum and by no ability your rival or enemy. what's it going to break to be well mannered to someone that is going to be a conceivable on your life. in case you do not imagine so because she is basically his mom, you basically wait until eventually the grandkids start up to attain. You and your marriage would have a a lot more suitable chance if this lady is on your area and by no ability operating adverse to you. She is after all HIS mom, he gained't like it if she is feeling harm on what's a vast day for her too. it is your wedding ceremony expensive even with the indisputable fact that it is not ALL about you. She gained't leave you on my own, by no ability, no longer see you later as your are her son's spouse so it is going to be a lot more suitable for all desirous about case you get off the severe horse and take care of the female with some appreciate if no longer kindness. The life and marriage you save are going to be your man or woman.

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Advice and opinions needed. I am having a hard time relating to my sister in law?

2 Answers