How do I make sure The Better Half is over my estate short of a marriage license?

The Better Half and I have be together now for a year plus. I know to some that may not seem like a long time. But, I knew after just two months, this lady was 'The One (& Only)' I had been searching for, for 20yrs. if not my whole life;) Now, I/we have a question as to how give her the (for the lack of a better term) all the power(s) as being my wife, short of getting married. The reason I ask is my life insurance policy. Mainly, including her on(or over) it as well as the other stuff. If you're askin why don't you just get married? Well, I tried that, I did propose to her and she accepted. Then, I went on an assignment to India and when I got home she said the marriage was off, due the not being 'In Love' thing(I looked this up on Yahoo Answers too, my favor reply was being 'In Love' is 'It's said too often that love is a journey rather than a destination. You shouldn't just sit back and expect love to happen to you -- you have to work for it.' Well there's other issues that mix into that discission like my snoring and her bein a lite sleeper, mainly. After she'd told me that I thought I was done for til I got to thinkin hey is the woman I proposed to(and she accepted). She'd not getting off(out of this) that easy. Then, I told her I'm NOT walking away, I'm NOT lettin YOU go just b-cuz you've lost the google eyed feelin for me while I was aboard working for our future. During which time we skype daily sometime more offen then that. So, we've basicly come to living apart, now. But, we still see each other and no one else.