I need advice from anyone who has lost a parent or grandparent?

Michaela, your mom is lucky to have such a thoughtful daughter as you. You are right - your mom has not really gone through the process yet of coming to terms with her own mother dying - she will have some big changes ahead. Most adult children who were once abused or neglected, go through the same grieving process as everyone else when losing their parents - but they may start to "act out" or appear aloof or cold to an obviously heart-felt event such as the death of their parent. Sometimes, once free of their oppressor, they become better people - other times, since they have not dealt with what happened in childhood, they go through a period of depression or other emotional upheaval. Your mom probably won't regret spending more time with her own mom - more like she will be glad to get on with her own life now. It's going to be a bit of a different time for both of you - be supportive to your mom - but also grieve the death of your grandmother as you should. Often relationships with grandchildren are much better than with their own children as they saw that what they did to their own children was not right - and are compensating for previous poor behaviour with being a better grandparent than they were as an actual parent. My own father did not speak with his dad for 20 years so I did not get to know my grandfather at all. My dad treated his grandchildren much better than his own children, and especially so after his own father died. I am sure my dad had regrets - but he became a better person/parent once the threat of his own father was no longer there to influence his life. Hope this helps. :)

just tell your mom you're sorry she passed and let it be. tell her u realize they werent close but losing a mom is probably always hard. and leave it at that. it will take awhile to sink in and believe me - the guilt from the bad relationship will prob set in at some point and she wont need anything else to make the sorrow of losing her mom sink in. and NO ONE can make that better. she will deal with it in her own way - it might be months - it might be years. she is an adult and will find a way. just offer sympathy short and sweet right now. your support and love mends wounds that she feels from her own bad stuff growing up. Sorry about your loss.

it depends on the individual. It may hit her later, it may not, don't know what her true feelings are, or her personality. Just tell her that u r sorry that her mom died and that you love her, let her know ur thinking of her. My dad and his dad stayed in touch for 60 yrs, something happened later his dad died, he didn't even go to funeral, doesnt seem upset bout it. I think thats more on the rare side

There are no magic words and not something is going to make issues extra desirable. dropping a pal is a foul and hectic journey. dropping the two mothers and fathers ahead is surprising. inspite of the undeniable fact that, there is not any averting the reality of the situation. the only thank you to stand that is head-on. Your boyfriend will locate his very own course with the aid of this. He has no determination. you are able to help him via being the guy who you have continually been. The worst achieveable factor you will desire to do is to start performing distinctive or strange over this. surprisingly replaced habit on your area isn't liked via him. basically be your self. it relatively is all you're able to do.

If they didn't have a great relationship, there's really nothing you need do at all.