Mormons, is this an acceptable way to treat your son?

Question

Back when I was in high school I had a friend who's family was Mormon, rather than using his real name let's call him Bob. Bob's parents thought that he was out of control, he listened to heavy metal music (Iron Maiden was his favorite band), started to grow his hair long, often preferred to spend his time at home in his room rather than with the family, drank Coke (gasp), and he didn't always listen to his parents and occasionally spoke back to them. Basically he was a pretty normal teenager in the 80's except that unlike most of my other friends I can't remember him once drinking alcohol or using drugs. But to his parents he was out of control. So when he was 17 they had him institutionalized in the juvenile wing of the local mental health hospital. He was in there for about 5 or 6 months. On his 18th birthday he was released from the hospital, since there was absolutely nothing wrong with him. When he called home to get a ride from the hospital he found the number had been changed. He eventually got in touch with a friend who gave him a ride home. There he found that his key did not work in the door and knocked. A woman he did not answered. When he asked who she was and where his parents were she informed him that she had bought the house 3 months earlier. So basically his family locked him away, moved, left no information of where they had gone to and completely abandoned him. Luckily he had an aunt who lived several hours away who had escaped the church 20 years earlier, she came to get him and took him in until he got his life back together. So Mormons, I thought you guys were all about the family? Is this how you would treat your child?

Update:

Woops: A woman he did not know.

Update 2:

@BC: Not a fabricated story at all, it is 100% true.

Update 3:

To all the people saying he could not be held for that long without reason: That would be true if he had been an adult. At that time in the 80;s in many areas of the country minors could be held until the age of 18 as long as the hospital agreed. This particular hospital was notorious for being willing to hold minors as long as the bills were being paid. Luckily this has changed where I live. Newer laws require a hearing for involuntary treatment of minors over the age of 14, but that law did not go into effect until 1995. There were several people I knew who were held at this hospital for days, weeks, even months against their will. Some were in there for legitimate reasons, suicide attempts, self harm etc. but some were in there for no real reason at all. This was just the most extreme case.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I wouldn't put it past them, having raised a few of my own mormon relatives "troublesome" kids who they were so ashamed of, they foisted them off on us, the "dirty apostates" of the family.  (Mainly because we were far from their mormon neighborhood scuttlebutt?)  Not once did they realize THEY enhanced the problems of these kids--who already were wonderful human beings and continue to be today.  Only after my LDS relatives left the church did they finally realized they had basically abandoned their own children when they needed their parents the most.  Some "family" church.  So, keep abandoning your children because of your mormonism.  There's plenty of ex-mo's around to take them in.  Always.

Only God can make good come from evil.  Good thing, too.

Cherry · Answer

I am mormon, and this story bothers me. Mormons aren't perfect, they are human. If I wanted to, I could find a story just like that except it is with a catholic, muslim, jewish, or any other religion. Seriously, there are no perfect people. There are good mormons, and of course, there are crazy mormons, like every religion out there. And how do you know that is all the story there is? How do you know ere wasn't other stuff going on in his house that you weren't aware of? You were his friend, but that doesn't mean you are with him every second of the day to know his family life. And how do you know his family abandoned him? Maybe they got evicted from the house, or had to move for other reasons. If what you say is true, then they are humans. Mormons never claim to be perfect beings. I will answer this question later, when I a, not in school and find stories of other religious people that did this, so stop picking on Mormons. By the way, mormons drink coke. It is actually my favorite.

Penny Lane · Answer

Im sorry but thats crap.

First off, you cant just "have someone institutionalized for 5 or 6 months".  There has to be a medically documented reason for it.  And if there was enough reason, judged by medical professionals, for him to stay HALF A YEAR, there is a whooooooole lot more to this story.

This actually sounds more like the kind of story you hear about the FLDS.  Ya know.. too many menfolk around, too much competition for the plural wives. So they find some BS excuse to ex them from the community. Leave them on the side of the road, etc.

You're problem with this bit of fiction is that you forgot that to be "locked up" like that, it actually requires a pretty serious mental problem.  Maybe HE didnt tell you he was doing drugs and suicidal?  Maybe HE didnt tell you he was stealing from his family to get heroin?  Maybe HE didnt feel the need to mention he had hit his mom in a fit of anger?

Maybe you're lying. If not, you are definitely not telling the whole story.

angusmaclure · Answer

Having been (unfortunately) raised as LDS I can say with absolute certainty that 99% of the members of that church would be appalled at treating someone in such a way. I still have a very good relationship with my Mormon parents even though I'm now an atheist and argue with them about their religious views all the time.

Neerp · Answer

You're not telling us the entire story. The juvenile wing of the local mental health hospital would have sent him home three days later if they did not think there was something seriously wrong with him. They would evaluate him and very quickly realize he did not belong there and send him back to his parents.

They did not do this. They kept him. Why?

This person may have been seriously screwed up, and his parents too, but this has NOTHING to do with the Mormon church.

Ammon · Answer

blah blah blah you want Gay marriage...  blah blah blah you hate Mormons because they won't let you become a Scout Master for the Boy Scouts and take under age children into the woods...  often.

blah blah blah Mormons give more money to charity than any other group of people in the world and no other group of people in the world is even in the same ballpark according to income tax returns.  So therefor...

you hate Mormons.  Blah blah blah...

you are angry at Mormons because you have V.D. and they don't and...

so therefor you go online and make stuff up against Mormons.

You may be fooling some people.  But you aren't fooling me.

I see you.  I know you.  And I know what you're up to.

http://Mormon.org Chat.


God bless.

? · Answer

i think of this sums it up extremely top... Doctrine and Covenants 121:39 - 39 we've found out by unhappy adventure that it fairly is the character and disposition of especially much all men, as quickly as they get a sprint authority, as they assume, they're going to at modern-day start to exercising unrighteous dominion. even if Mormon doctrine glorifies women and womanhood, and my own expensive husband has found out nicely from each and all of the final government to handle his spouse and teenagers with love and appreciate, i won't have the ability to help yet be conscious that there ARE men who %. and decide among the doctrines with the intention to exercising their penchant for domination. There ARE some very depressing women in "Mormondom" using fact of those manipulative jerks. particular, that's basic to abuse women who have not got the economic skill (or the actual stamina, using being pregnant, etc) to tell a jerk the place to pass... That stated, i think of maximum folk of the management is nice and honest, and extremely loving and supportive of their better halves... genuinely, finding lower back, all of my Bishops have been married to extremely dominant women, lol! particular, I do think of being pregnant does make one experience extremely powerless (I hate being pregnant.. however the outcomes are well worth it, lol). besides the shown fact that, i've got in no way been taken care of as a "2d classification citizen". genuinely, from what i've got gleaned from the classes, and how i've got been taken care of by my honest husband, i've got continuously felt honored and precious for my goddess like features. lots of the "Mormon jerks" i understand have been semi-lively. the lads who humbly study the classes and be conscious them... they're real gem stones of humanity! each (good) female merits a husband like that!

Elsie · Answer

Even if this story is true, why are you asking Mormons? Are you implying that because one Mormon family mistreated their child, that all Mormons would behave in the same way? That's a bit bigoted of you.

No, Mormons in general wouldn't abandon children who don't conform to their standards of behavior.

Gomakawitnessofjesus · Answer

its a rough choice, to make. but i have said similar things. Yes. 
but i have said in the past, as soon as they become 16, if the state allows it, to give him papers of emancipation. 
when i was 16, i saw it done to a guy, his mother was religious and single, he was not religious and always in trouble. she and my family were not mormon. 
when my uncle got a woman pregnant, my grandfather kicked hiim out of the house, when my mother got pregnant, He provided her with furniture and helped her move out with my father. 
even in the 80's it was a different era. no computers, no cell phones, cable had only started in the 70's, maybe people had 35 channels. people believed in a code of ethics.

maybe this action was not justified, maybe you only know half the story ! maybe there was soemthing else more evil than just some teenager listening to satan music. and yes there is something wrong with idolatry.  do you remember the story of mariam, who was cast out of the congregation of Israel. ? its almost the same principle.

jesus said the worst enemies can be those of one's own household.

10 And the cloud departed from off the tabernacle; and, behold, Miriam became leprous, white as snow: and Aaron looked upon Miriam, and, behold, she was leprous.
      •  •  •
  15 And Miriam was shut out from the camp seven days: and the people journeyed not till Miriam was brought in again.

Anonymous · Answer

Sad indeed.I once a Maiden fan.7th son of the 7th son my favourite album.And I wasn't put in the madhouse.Listening to metal bands open up your minds unlike the patheic feeble church.Cheers

mormon_4_jesus · Answer

Not knowing the other side of hte story, I would have to say no, the parents were not being good parents. The church would NEVER EVER expect any parent to abandon their child, even if they WERE out of control.

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Mormons, is this an acceptable way to treat your son?

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