I think I have developed severe depression and don't know what to do.?

Question

I am a 58 yr. old man and moved to a small town in Ireland from a big city in England several years ago, to try to improve my life. I have had a few episodes of depression in the past, but my life in Ireland has not turned out as well as I hoped. Materially I am fairly well off - house, car, money in bank - but I don't think I am thinking straight and feel everybody hates me, is gossiping and plotting against me, including the police, which logically I know isn't true. I live alone behind locked doors and can't think of a single reason to carry on living. I was referred for Cognitive behavioural therapy - I only went twice because I thought the therapist secretly hated me. I would rather die than go into another psychiatric ward. I never married, no kids, just me. My cat even left! I often think of jumping off a cliff of which there are plenty around here, and have made several trips to find a good spot. I don't even have the guts to open letters, or to tidy the house and have been trying to think of a way to just 'disappear' because I don't want to upset or inconvenience anyone, including the police and medical profession. I have no appetite and go for days without eating. I just don't trust anyone any more and am afraid to answer the phone. I am taking an antidepressant (Mirtazapine/Zispin) but to little or no avail. I wish I had a woman in my life, but it's a bit late in life now and the last relationship I had ended in 1986 and I think it's true to say I never recovered from the breakup. I am posting on Yahoo 'cos I don't have the guts to tell people face-to-face. Everybody seems to have clean, tidy houses, but mine is pretty cluttered. I block people on Facebook for no reason. Jumping off a cliff seems like a good idea to me, but no-one else I know is considering it - so does anyone have a clue what is wrong with me? Occasionally I get tears in my eyes, but I've done all the crying - alone. It seems that whatever you have when you're young (energy/optimism) just fades away, and now all I have left is tearful memories of happy childhood days long gone - and all I have to look forward to is death. Please don't tell me to "pull myself together" or "snap out of it". It doesn't work like that. This may be my last post, as I feel the cliff calling again. I wish you all the best and love you all.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Many people have testified that when they died in their hospital bed and came back to life later that they met Jesus, and He told them it is not time for them to be taken, and He sent them back into their body and they were miraculously healed... all to the doctors and nurses amazement. Others who died saw their bodies from above as they left and headed down a dark tunnel where they could see flames and the smell of sulfur ahead. They called out to the Lord Jesus to save them, and He did and sent them back into their bodies to tell others... the doctors and nurses could not believe they came back to life. I have several friends who prayed for such a man who died in a hospital bed, and he came back to life after 3 hours. I also know that man and that this was verified by the hospital as being all true.

 God did not create you to commit suicide. Ask the Lord Jesus Christ to be your Lord and Savior, as He died on the cross for your sins. Start reading the New Testament of the bible. Go to the church God puts on your heart to. Live for Christ, and you will find peace and happiness.

Shinigami · Answer

Yeah, that sounds pretty bad.  Could be a chemical imbalance.  You may need more than just 2 sessions, and also go see a GP and have some blood work done.  My daughter was feeling down and went in, thinking she had a hormone imbalance and the doctor ran some tests and found she was low on Vitamin D.

I'm not saying this is your problem, but anything to help along the way man.  You might have cabin fever.  Happens a lot at this time of year, and if you are already low, it's not going to make things better.  Go get some bloodwork done and a GP you only have to see now and then, not every week.

? · Answer

Hi, there. You are a beautiful person.
This all sounds cliche, but God himself created you for a purpose.

Every trial we go through life makes us stronger. Just got to believe in the Lord.
Perhaps, today is the day to make the Lord Jesus the savior of your life.

? · Answer

i have a link to a movie i want you to watch.  its a documentary.  its called The Human Experience.  Don't just watch the trailer and decide you don;t care.  watch it.  you're asking for help cause you want some help and this is the best help that i can offer so please acccept it.

k well the only link i could find had spanish subtitles but its still very watchable.  please, please watch it it will change your life.  hope you enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GisNDGkPw4E

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I think I have developed severe depression and don't know what to do.?

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