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What to do about relationship girlfriend loan bipolar/mental?
My GF needs help with her rent again and about to be evicted. Should I help her out or should I not. Done it before but never received a cent from a loan given the year before $1k. She suffers from depression/bipolar. I want to help because there is no one else that can help. Even her family will not assist or maybe they have just given up on her. I'm not working, but I can help. But also want to protect myself as I am on the borderline of going my own way and just being a friend. I'm just a bit stressed over it. If I dont help she could be living in her car or homeless. I think she will turn things around if I help her this last time. She is a good/great person and just needs some help. I'm trying my best, but I'm looking for work myself. I just dont want to be $2k deep over this situation. I have made up loan documentation in the past but here we are again, only difference is I'm (unemployed) laid off now. Has anyone else been in this situation. Just thinking....Just thinking....It's been a tough year for me, but im dealing with it the best I can. I Love/care about this person, but don't see a long term future with them maybe as friends. She has a decent job, no kids and her mental situation gets in the way of progress at times. I found out a year ago that she had these problems (mental/bipolar) but hid them from me, but I still hung in there after finding out. She is pretty smart and has good values. I'm just not sure, like I said my own stress is
bothering me too.
2 Answers
- 8 years agoFavorite Answer
No. You should never give money to someone who has an addictive/compulsive or other type of disorder who are prone to simply spending it off (especially when a person with bipolar disorder goes through a manic stage, they spend money on excess). The best help is to be emotionally, but never financially, supportive. You can be the one who she can go to for advice, the one who she can call in the middle of the night, the one who can reinforce her sense of security and confidence in herself. If you really love her, you should be willing to handle all the "cons," all the "difficulties" that come with a person who has a serious disorder/health problem.
But you're really letting her walk all over you with these loans.
YOU are the one without a job, not her. If she gets evicted, then there's nothing you could've done about it besides giving her money, and we've already discussed that. Giving advice and being as supportive as possible is best. Just remember: you have to take care of yourself before you're well enough to take care of others.
- ?Lv 45 years ago
Who's the predominant on the account, you or her? In spite of who it's, you will have to name the loan enterprise and inform them of the difficulty. (the important man or woman is regularly the character who gets the most phone calls). Give them the entire knowledge that you've got on her. Mobile quantity, work number, new tackle, work deal with (if you have it). This may help in monitoring the vehical if they do ought to repo it (and cost you much less in the end) also, if you do voluntaraly reliquish the vehical, it is going to fee you much less in the end. You should also file a police report. Im now not certain if which you can mark it as stolen for the reason that she is a co-signer but it's both of your homes. If she denies that she is aware of where the automobile is, then file it stolen right AWAY after which flip over the know-how to your loan manufacturer. The police could let you know it's a civil topic and also you have got to take it up in civil court. If that is the case, attempt to look for what your authorized choices are. For the reason that you both signed the agreement, you both are still accountable for the repayments.