Equal opportunity but still segregation? Different employee requirements based on sex?

You can find a lawyer and try to set new policy by suing.

As to people saying "this is the law," the law constantly changes through people like you matching forces with a lawyer. This type of law is the prime example.

The company's position is that there are real economic consequences to not being able to regulate employee demeanor in this way. They can lose business if their employees have poor appearance, and poor appearance rests on social norms (e.g. disfavor of long-haired, ear-ringed men).

That said, this has been true of virtually any change. The problem with this logic is that it perpetuates the very social norms that create the economic consequences to allowing / not being able to fire these workers (merely for appearance).

The same was true for, e.g. black workers. There were real consequences and lost customers upon having these less desirable workers (on appearance only, not productivity) because customers would have been turned away (through these subjective norms and perceptions).

Similarly, courts once tried to deny custody to an interracially involved mother. Although the court properly applied the best interests tests for the child -- (at the time the child indeed would have received public stigma and persecution at school) -- the Supreme court still overruled them. The court was overruled because to cater to irrational public views like this only perpetuates that problem. The same can be argued of irrational customer perceptions to lack of hair or earrings. (But you get into trouble if you try and stretch this into more rational, widely shared norms like disfavor of bodily odor).

You have a founded argument, but you are up against the inertia of the law and may well lose. Are you a warrior?

No laws are broken here. This all pertains to grooming. Companies have the right to expect their employees to adhere to company rules. Especially if you have contact with customers.

There are laws that deal with gender discrimination. But these laws don't apply in your situation.

I hear ya, I love wearing an undershirt & a long sleeved dress & long pants to work when its 95 degrees out and women can wear a sleeveless dress with bare legs

Welcome to the World that LITERALLY ALL Democrats EXPRESSLY DEMAND.