Will you immerse yourself in "The Girl" and help improve this draft before the conclusion?

Gerald: Thanks for your kind answer. Just gave you a thumbs up as well. I wish I could meet you in person. I bet you are a real piece of work. Regards, Thomas

Todd: great to see you again brother. This is an interesting suggestion, and my poem Anarchy 2016 was sort of like what you are suggesting. Will resource your link and definitely entertain your advice. Thank you so much.

Oldcomer: Welcome and thank you for your answer. You give a trenchant argument for vignettes, and that is something I probably have done without defining such, but with this story leading to Bridget's event, I do not know how to do it. Perhaps what I am doing is not even for poetry. I appreciate your answer.

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Oldcomer: duh me sir. Re-viewing your answer, you are 100% right, and the thing I need to work on is developing the flow of vignettes, and possibly dropping the other examples of good deeds, but that is the premise for the ending...still, maybe too much here. Thanks

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Thank you all for the great answers to this point. So far Gerald has Best Answer, but it's really too close......lol

Please keep in mind this was a first draft, which many times works. Many of my prior poems where you see the end product, it may have looked like the above at first, seemingly not looking like a poem, redundant, et al. I decided to release this as a first draft to get help on variations of format and poetic style to get my story across, which is a very compelling one. I appreciate all answers, no matter what, even the ones I make not like. Everyone is different and that is okay with me. I now have a better idea of how to complete this, and will keep this open a couple more days depending on the response, which has been very good so far. Grace 2U and Happy Mothers Day to all the Mothers out there. Mom .>>>> I love you, you're the best, and enjoy your day. Thomas

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Am fixing to give out Best Answer here shortly. There will be a part two to this, but will bring back later and edit this poem.

If I were to judge Best Answer strictly by who got the most Thumbs Up....wow....Gerald, congratulations, 'you da man.' On the other hand, think about how ridiculous this TU/TD thing is and the folks that participate in order to 'one up' the other. Those that had to bully up some Thumbs up for Gerald and hammer some others, not because of their kind and apposite answers, but of their silly little game...shame on your foolishness. I like to encourage others and give a thumbs up when deserving, but Gerald's answer-----Lord, please give me restraint. So, in the spirit of giving, I am going to give Best Answer to one that deserves if cause of the good answer, and also cause they have to put up with some who clearly need some help. Just my opinion, as am American, am entitled to that much, though this is stacked against decent people,

so be it, the more TD's the merrier for me. Thanks, Thomas .

correction: bottom above 'as an American' the spilled blood for freedom, even for the few % or troublemakers, is their right also, we fought for it but take it lightly. The problem I see is democracy has been tarnished by Liberalism. Argue with me as much as you'd like, but the rights now of a small percentage are overly protected to the point it is dismantling our fabric before our very eyes. You think not, then think again. Still, I love you, and that is what the God of the universe wants of each one of us, to love one another, and try to get along better would be a nice thing.

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