What's the proper etiquette for a Military Homecoming?

First, Ma'am, please understand that it's not my intent to belittle the occasion, but "homecoming" is a term generally applied -- at least in my experience -- to the return of a veteran from a period of deployment -- most often a combat deployment. A kid graduating from Boot Camp is really no big thing... except perhaps to your friend. Ok, the kid's been away from home. But he's lived in barracks which, while they lack the privacy of his own room at home, they're pretty comfortable. He's been cared for probably as well as (if not better than) he ever has in his life. In Boot Camp, any "hard times" he may have had to endure were pretty much all self-inflicted... he brought them on himself. The mindset of the instructors is for him to succeed. It's hard not to. When he gets into combat, the mindset of the enemy is for him to fail... and it's hard not to... which is why "homecoming" from a combat tour is generally looked on as celebratory.

Second, you needn't bring anything special -- except perhaps to impress the other contributors. The kid will have been eating in a "mess hall" for 90 days. He's not going to care. Probably anything you prepare will be welcome. So, if you're doing it for the kid, I'd keep it simple. You might ask the kid's mother what he might like. If, however, you're doing it for the occasion, then it's up to you. You might ask the kid's mother what she needs.

Third, at this point, he's only had a little training. While he's volunteered to "serve his country," and while the training has begun to prepare him for that effort, he really hasn't gotten that far yet. Keep in mind that a great many condescend to join the military, not to "serve" anything, but for the benefits. Early in my training, I was asked, "Sailor, do you want to die for your country?" If he has his head around that question... if he's really ready to go... then he has my respect. There aren't many WW II Vets left. The Korean Vets aren't too far behind. We Vietnam Vets aren't getting any younger. And now we have a growing crop of Vets from the Middle East. If your friend's son is of that caliber, that's the kind of person I want to have following those who've gone before them... ready to catch the flag when we fall.

I retired after 20 years in the Navy. I've had a training command. And I initially enlisted, and went through 3 months of Boot Camp. And I was deployed several times in combat. I'm wondering what she's going to do for him when he really "comes home." In my experience, many just want to be left alone while they sort out their thoughts and get their heads around the fact that they're no longer being hunted in the combat environment that they've been in for a year or so. For some, it takes a while. For a few... they never really make it back.

A nice card and maybe before the event you can send over some of the cups/napkins/ that sort of thing so that you have done what you can within your time slot.

The fact that they are doing such a big thing for him JUST doing boot camp is nice but a little OTT to me...........so no, no gift is required at all...............had he been coming home from a deployment then I would have said yes a gift card for restaurant would be good, but in this case nothing is expected or at least it should NOT be.

Just show up, bring a dish if you want.

Graduating boot camp isn't that big of a deal, really.

Been there, done that wore out the tee shirt from both sides of the bleachers.

This seems rather bizarre. Getting out of boot camp isn't "serving your country".

Tens of millions of us have worn an army uniform. Just putting on those clothes doesn't make you a "hero".

I would suggest cancelling such a pretentious event and just having the family greet him and give him some good home cooking.

Just show up and say congrats

That will mean more than anything

He is just graduating boot camp. The first step in a very long journey.

Do we even look like we care,

reported for NO MILITARY CONTENT.