I've forgotten who my boyfriend is?

Question

Not literally, I know who he is. But at the start of this month I returned from a 3 week holiday with my family and I hadn't seen him for that long, we've been going out for 8 months now and I missed him so very much whilst I was away. We messaged each other as often as we could and we were both going crazy the 3 weeks until I came back, it's the longest we'd been apart.

But when I got home he came over to see me, and I felt really awkward. I'd stopped craving to see him the day I knew I was going home and when he showed up at my house I felt like he was a stranger. It was so weird, he was stood there at my door and I just felt like I didn't know him.

I hugged and kissed him and such as he would expect but I felt really awkward doing so and I have no idea why! I thought maybe I was just nervous but why would I be? Ever since I got home from my holiday I just feel weird around him, like I don't know him and we're in the beginnings of our relationship again. 

Yet I remember everything we've done, all our time together and places we've been, but it doesn't feel like we did any of that stuff...if that makes sense.

Every now and again I have some weird moment where I think I've just invented him in my head and he's not a real person...I don't know whether I've got some memory problems or what but it's freaking me out. The last couple of weeks I've just wanted him to leave me alone whereas he wants to keep spending time together to make up for the time we lost but for some reason I just don't want to see him.

I've either forgotten who he is, or I've completely gone off him, which is stupid because I was so upset being apart from him for so long up until the day I saw him again. I really don't know what's going on, should I mention it to him, or would that just freak him out?

Anonymous · Answer

Sometimes it is the familiarity of being with the person that we miss. It gives a sort of distorted view of that person. Surprisingly 3 weeks is a long time to be apart, especially when you are young. Add to this that you have been on holiday and this is a completely different environment, you have grown up more, experienced different things. As a girl you will mature quicker (i.e. grow up) than a guy - as a teenager you will be 3 years ahead of him - an adult. You do see him in a different light - you have grown up and realise that you have a lot of life still to live and, deep down, you think that being in a relationship with him is going to hold you back, that you went away a child and have come back as an adult. The times you shared now feel like kid's stuff. It is not wrong to feel this way - sometimes relationships just fizzle out - because one or the other of you feels that they don't want the same thing any more. Because of that you find him irritating, you feel guilty because you think that you shouldn't feel like this. But you do and honestly that feeling won't go away - never stay together because of guilt - it never works. Just tell him that you are no longer in the same place as him, that your relationship has run its course, that you want to be friends, you appreciate, enjoyed the time you have had together but you need to move on. An awful lot of relationships finish in the period of a holiday just because you get used to being without that person and you find that there is more to life. Good luck and take care :)

Gaia’s Garden · Answer

Many young people fall in love with the idea of having a boyfriend or girlfriend. Then when they think about things, they realize the person they are with isn't the person they built up in their heads. It's quite common, really.

Ana · Answer

Maybe you just don't really like-like him anymore. Maybe you did miss him, but now that you're back you realize you only want him around as a friend.

? · Answer

I guess u lost interest in him it's prob time to break it off

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I've forgotten who my boyfriend is?

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