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Personal/Village Attorney's Mom Funeral Mass Thursday - Atheist with a Question?
Our personal (and our village’s) attorney’s mother passed away Monday, age sixty-four. I am a village trustee, elected in December unanimously by our overwhelmingly Christian town.
He was at the village board meeting when his mother passed away.
Both my wife and I highly respect our attorney, and he is fully aware we are atheists; we both work for the village government.
(As it happens, he was the person who administered my affirmation of office when I was elected to the village board in December, and researched state law to ensure I could get around the state constitutional requirement for an oath to a deity.)
A funerary Mass for his mother is to be held Thursday. While both my wife and I are of the opinion that prayer is of no particular use, such things as funerary Masses are for the living, not the dead. Ritual (religious or otherwise) seems to be built into the human psyche.
We are fairly new here in town (two years); the whole county is quite aware we are atheists and knows us, and a goodly portion of the county will be at that Mass. So the question to posit to the group here is how much of a faux pas would it be to turn up at the Mass (in support of our attorney in his time of difficulty)?
As village officials it seems appropriate (though we are both atheists), so what do both Christians and atheists think about this?
I am aware how a Mass is conducted (I have been to them before, though I was a Wiccan and never a Christian). As we live in an overwhelmingly religious community, this particular situation seems likely to occur more and more often; cutting ourselves out of our tiny community's rituals (weddings, deaths, &c) over religious differences to me would seem petty.
I thank everyone for their opinions. We will be going to the funeral at the Catholic Church. I will place the question up for vote for best answer, but all the answers were good.
5 Answers
- ?Lv 68 years agoFavorite Answer
You should go.
Funereal rites are for the living--you already acknowledged that.
Your friend needs you now, whether you believe or not.
Source(s): Atheist. - 8 years ago
It sounds like you are going to a Catholic service. I am Protestant. I don't think it would be bad for you to go. If you don't want to pray, and just stay quite while other people are praying, that sounds nice. I think it would be unusual if you didn't go. You are a person who would normally go to that persons funeral, the only difference is your religious views. However, this is a funeral, not a church service. So it is understood there might be people in attendance that have different views. Such as a Protestant friend, who doesn't believe in holy water or Rosaries. Of course a close friend of the family that happened to be a Protestant would attend the funeral. And they believe different things. You believe different things, but were close to this person, and of course you should go to the funeral.
- MackenzieLv 78 years ago
I honestly see nothing wrong with showing up to special masses like memorials, weddings, funerals, christenings, etc. of people of different religions. These things are always in the religion of the person (people) they're about-- I think it's understood that not every single attendee must be of the same faith.
I'm Wiccan, but when someone I know who is Christian dies, I go pay my respects and go to the funeral. I don't see it as a big deal, no one has ever been offended by it.
- ?Lv 68 years ago
First of all, my sincere condolences on your loss.
I was raised in the catholic church and I can tell you that it is perfectly appropriate for you to be there. I'm sure your lawyer will be happy that you came to support him in his time of grief. I'm sure there will be enough people there that you can kind of fake your way through the hymns and the profession of faith and such. My ex is southern baptist and used to go to mass sometimes when I tried to reunite with the church. He got to be very good at lip syncing. As far as the Eucharist is concerned, you probably won't be the only ones sitting it out, if your lawyers church is like my mom's.
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- 8 years ago
Not only would it not be inappropriate to go, it would be wrong to stay away. If you were Protestant, Jewish, or Muslim you would go and be welcomed, right? I'm certainly not saying atheism is a religion, but the point is that non-believers are welcomed at funerals, and the faux pas would be to not go.
