I am finding it so hard to accept the face that my grandad is dying?

Question

Just yesterday he had been diagnosed with advanced lung cancer. He was bad for months and they couldn't point out what it was an when they've found out there's nothing that can be done about it. The cancers spread too far to be able to treat. I saw him today and I was in shock.. He is in so much pain. He can't talk properly, hasn't ate, can't move and is having trouble breathing. I'm finding it so hard watching him i pain not being able to help. He is all wired up, he is also staring in to air. I've never seen him this bad before and it was so hard to not cry infront of him.. I stayed strong and didn't cry infront of him because I didn't want to make it worse. We don't know how long he has left, but it doesn't look good.. Yellow face and very weak. By the way that the doctors are acting it seems as if they think he doesn't have long because they are telling him he can have anything he wants to relieve pain, and they're also taking the hospital bed to my grandparents home where he can pass away there. This has come as such a shock, I only found out yesterday and it's in such late stages of cancer he may only have days left. In seventeen and I don't know how to cope, it hasn't even sunk in yet.

Marie · Answer

I know this must be hard. I'm also seventeen and have lost a few family members to lung cancer (asbestos related). Try to focus on the positives - your grandad had a long life and you got to spend a lot of good time with him. Don't miss the oppotunities you have to talk to hm before he passes on. If you're religious, that will help, talk to your pastor/priest/rabbi etc. And they might be able to tell you something that will help you find peace. If he's suffering, think of him passing in the way that he'll be free from pain. It's hard, but not impossible. Just try to make the most of the time you have left with him, and keep the grandad from your childhood alive in your head - don't let the image of him suffering jade your memories. I hope something I said was helpful, and I'm sorry for this horrible situation.

Anonymous · Answer

I know how you feal I was in the same situation when my grandad died of Lung cancer when I was 13.  I'm 18 now and I can tell you their is nothing you can do to prepear yourself.  The best advise I can give you is to see him and comfort him as mutch as possible.  Ask him the questions you Always wanted to ask him.        My grandad died and till this day I am full of regret from not properly seeing him because I was to scared to see him like that.   Don't live in regret.

? · Answer

it is shocking what cancer does to somebody and it almost makes you want to put them out of their misery but it was your grandad he is close to death and that is what happens in life at least you have got to know the pain you feel for somebody it is horrible but it makes you appreciate live more

ginger · Answer

you poor thing,,,if I were you I would take every moment I could to be with him, tell him everything you want to tell him, hold his hand and stroke his head. you will be so glad that you did, take the opportunity to say a good goodbye xx

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I am finding it so hard to accept the face that my grandad is dying?

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