Why do i want a baby so much?

I went through the same thing when I was in my early 20s. I think it's maybe a biological clock ticking. And it seemed like everywhere I turned there were babies. I've gone through stages of this, again in my later 20s when a coworker was like "oh my gosh, you're right. Every time I work with you, there are a million babies!"

Props to you for at least recognizing that this is not a good time for you to have a baby. I knew the same thing back then, as I was still in University. I'm not sure how to tell you to get over it but essentially what happened with me, was a major life change (a break up and a career change/travel). Not saying that you need a break up, I'm sure your boyfriend is fantastic. Or that you need the extreme of working abroad. But those changes made me set in stone that I wasn't ready to settle down and as much as I knew I wanted a family someday, it wasn't that day.

Since I have come home, and decided I am ready to settle, I want a baby again, but I am waiting for Mr. Right.

While I do think that for both of us there is an innate knowingness that we are meant to be a mother, and that is never going to away, you just have to affirm to yourself that you know you will be a great mom in the future. Find something else to occupy you right now, something else that you can be passionate about and fills your heart with purpose. This will give you something to focus on besides having babies. And it may fuel your fire to the point that you know with certainty you have to pursue it before having kids, putting that thought on the back burner.

Sometimes I think women want babies as a way to fill a void in their life. Sometimes not. Ask yourself if there is something missing? There may not be. Or maybe its a combo of that and a true desire to be a mom.

Whatever your reason, just try to fill your days with purpose and happiness. This will only bring you closer to being ready for a baby when the time is right!

Bringing a baby into an unstable financial situation is cruel, IMNSHO. Plus, you said you aren't very good with kids. That may be your intuition telling you that you might not be cut out to be a parent, even if your financial situation was better.

Maybe buying/adopting a pet or doing some volunteer work will help fill the void.

tt is your motherly instincts kicking in. It coming while you are young thereby increasing your changes giving birth to a health baby hopefully in a good relation with a man to become it father. You are having normal expected urges and feelings toward given child birth. Good luck and I hope you have a your baby someday soon.