my daughter Invites friends over without asking?

Kick her friends out. If your daughter can't respect the rules, then she shouldn't be allowed to have friends over at all.

It's your house, your rules.

I am / was a single dad . My kid is now 22 and still lives with me . You have got 2 sides to this to look at . One is it really a huge deal if she has a friend over . Meaning are they sitting in her bedroom watching Tv or playing a video game or are they destroying the house creating more work . If they are just being a kid and telling stories about " that cute boy in math class" let it go . They are not causing trouble and yeah maybe its annoying to have someone in your house and you want to come home and stink up your own bathroom or whatever , But if at is a case of you walking in the house and they have made a mess because they tried burning cookies and thrown clothes from one end to the other, then yeah maybe you should put an end to it . Thing is if you take away somewhere for a 14 year old kid to have a safe quiet place to be a kid then your basically pushing a 14 year old to go hang out with her friends somewhere else and then you are now faced with coming home and then having to go find your kid and God knows what they are getting up to away from moms eyes and that's where things tend to go wrong .. Sometimes the best way to make a kid into a responsible adult is to give them a safe place to be a kid even if its an inconvenience to you . I was pretty easy on my kid and we had some basic ground rules and she became a damn good responsible adult . Maybe find some neutral ground . Half the days no body over half the days she can have somebody there .. I personally think your over reacting a bit but there could be more than what you wrote in the question too .

You're not making a big deal about nothing, it's your house so you should have a say in who comes over at what time. Tell her if she does it again without asking permission there will be a consequence or punishment of some sort, because it sounds like she isn't taking you seriously enough. You deserve your down time after a long day at work, she should respect that.

She's testing limits///...I would have a list of things for her to do to help out around the house..

so she would not have time for friends

I would simply make the rule very clear with no friends during the week....weekend visits only with permission and only if she has been respectful and helpful, homework done and room clean

now honestly without her knowing...or you telling her...I would call all her friends and tell them no visiting during the week..you are tired and she is not listening following request...if they do come over uninvited by you ...then call their parents...

I think if the situation continued I would be taking things away like her cell phone for a week...

walk to and from school...

no weekend fun...until she got a clue...if she continued to ask I would have jobs for her...like vacuum do dishes...clean up dog poop...the message would be clear

*(*.

Sounds to me like she wants to be an equal in your house, then its time you treat her like an adult:

- She pays 50% of the rent

- She pays for her own groceries

- 50% of the internet bill

- 50% of all utilities

She is to pay you her half of the money at the beginning of each month and her payments are to be payed on time each month, and if she cannot or will not pull her weight then she will be kicked out and she will go live with her father.

Basically she needs to learn that with freedoms come responsibilities, and if she isn't contributiing to the house then she doesn't have a say in it, you pay the bills so you get the final say. I guarantee you she will hate these conditions imposed on her and she will learn that when she is asked to do something that she will follow through.

I would look at it this way. She is 14 and you know where she is. She feels comfortable enough with you that she has her friends over. Are they imposing on you to entertain them?

I totally get that you need your space. Somehow she needs to understand that this is not about you controlling what she does and when but learning as an adult soon to be to compromise and give you your free time.

If my kids have their buddies sleep over during the summer I sometimes have to kick them home just to get my house back. But I realize it is their space too.

She's obviously not mature enough to stay home by herself if she can't be trusted to follow the rules. Hire her a babysitter to show her how immature she's being. See if she invites her friend over with a babysitter hanging around; chances are she'll be too embarrassed.

Does she have a cell phone? if so take it away for a week or so?

Or you can ground her I would be disappointed if my kid did that without my permission I would be so mad if I were you.

She needs some major consequences that is not okay take her cell phone away or do something so that she will understand

You are her mother you can do whatever you want if she has a cell phone like check her text messages and make sure she is safe.

Who is the parent here, you or your daughter? If you aren't going to do anything about her defying you, of course she's going to keep doing it! Enforce your rules. Discipline her when she breaks them. If she has a cell phone, take it away. Ground her. Don't let her go out with friends. Take away her internet and TV privileges.

Honestly, this is NOT rocket science.

Its your house so your rules but she is right that you are making a big deal about nothing. Does her friend do anything bad? Does she make a mess? Cause a disruption? If you answer no to all three questions then I would conclude that you are just a b!**h...no offense.

She has no respect for such a simple request, it really isn't asking for a lot. Words clearly dont work, time to move on to punishments. If she ignored you again, she can go without her phone for a few days.