how long is too long to wait for marriage?

I met my husband in 1997 and we didn't get married until 2006. We waited till I was done college and he and I had good jobs then we bought a house then we got married. It makes more sense to be financially set at least a little before you jump into a marriage. Renting out apartments is a great way to make good money. He has a good head just be patient, help him to move his thought along and get it done. An open relationship is not a good thing at all and it will create trust issues for both of you.

First thing's first. In my opinion, marriage should come into the picture when you guys are both financially stable. Marriage means you are both ready to build a family, have children, and so it's important that you are able to meet their needs. As for the question, 8 years is definitely long and yeah, congrats! I don't think the number of years dating matter, and you are actually really blessed to have a guy who thinks about your future together. He wants to take things slow because he wants to be able to support you and his future family, not because his feelings are changing, which I think is fantastic! It shows how he is taking marriage, and you, seriously. Support him and maybe help him in buying the apartment and such, since both of you are in this together.

And yes I agree with the guy with the idea of having an open relationship as a no-no. He's doing his part by preparing himself for the future, and so respect your relationship in return. Besides, you guys love each other, so why would you taint yourself and your relationship with such a thing? :) Good luck and I wish you all the best!

I fear you won't like what I have to say...You've spent the most formative, important years of your youth - all of your youth since 15 years of age...With one and only one guy. Your social life has been on "hold" - you have not dated, you have built a life all around him when in fact? You forfeited a very important part of YOU in the doing...

Yes. I know. You were/are very young...It felt right. But it so isn't about love of him, as much as self awareness of what you needed to be doing those years alongside dating him, rather? Making life plans if not setting goals for yourself...Doing with friends and family APART from him and developing your own autonomy...

Now you are 23...He wants to wait until he buys a building no less...That means? Perhaps, you'll be 30...

You've wasted all this time on HIS DREAMS; HIS life; HIS needs and wants and goals...

Honey...You've already wasted part of your lifetime...It's time for you? To start living, reaching out to some of your goals and having a real life of decision making and CHOICES made by SOLELY you...

I wonder if you even "get" what I am saying...Babe, you've stayed TOO LONG "at the fair" as we say here in the west...

Grace (sigh)