Should Husband go to birthday party w/o his wife?

Honestly, this new arrangement the two of you have agreed to is going to negatively affect your marriage. For things such as golfing or hunting with the buddies or a day at the spa or baby shower for you this is a great plan but for nights out drinking and partying you are asking for trouble! Have a chat with him about the conditions of the arrangement you made and remember these kids belong to the both of you so leaving one home with the kids while the other parties and drinks is not what raising a family is all about.

My first thought was - why can't you find a reliable babysitter locally? Do you have friends with kids who use a babysitter? Perhaps you could find someone to hire who you can use from time to time. It might help you and your husband to have some couple time and go on dates.

Meanwhile, i doubt i'd feel upst or badly or anything negative if my husband went to his friend's birthday party without me because of no babysitter. Meanwhile, i'd be looking for someone responsible and who has references. I know there are people out there who babysit all of the time.

And if you don't find a babysitter for the birthday party night, do you have a friend who can come over and visit that evening? Might be fun.

I think the response from him was a bit thoughtless but he probabily didn't mean it to offend....as you had both agreed not to rely on family and have no other option for babysitting and with it being his friend I think he should probz go. If really u want him to stay home with you then none of you will get any sort of brake or social life. I would let him go and ask him if he could baby sit maybe the following week and you go out somewhere so all is fair and your both getting a bit of leisure time!

You're being selfish. If it's his friend and you don't want to use a babysitter, it's silly to think you should both sit home 365 days a year. I'm sure there will be occasions when you'd like to go out in the evening with girlfriends or whatever and he should be willing to reciprocate.

It would have been nice if he consulted with you first. Sounds like he's delighted with the idea and jumped at the chance. Someone's getting screwed here, and it's not him. Has he relegated you to the role of babysitter? It's time to turn the tables. Tell him you have plans that night and he can't go. Then MAKE plans. I guess then you'll see where you stand with him. I'm afraid the answer won't be pretty.

You cannot have it both ways. If you will not ask for a sitter you will be sitting at home. While he should not make a practice of it you two are not joined at the hip and yes he can do to a party without you if you insist on not getting a sitter.

Hmm, this is a tricky one. First of all, immediately talk to your husband about how hurt you were. I have seen too many relationships go down the drain because the wife would never talk about how she was feeling. You could also hire a nanny, if one is available in your area. Remember, this decision is not just up to your husband; it's up to you as well. I hope it all works out!

If he doesn't leave you home alone a lot, let him go. And then maybe he can return the favor and watch the kids so you can go out with friends occasionally.

Let him go, but make plans with your girlfriends to go out one Saturday night so hubby can babysit. Fair is fair.

you are being selfish.

Why wouldn't he be "allowed" to go? It's his friend, and for a couple of hours.

I would hope that he would do the same for you.