what to do about my current horse situation?

Question

I sold my horse a little more than a year ago, because I am away at college, and she is the type of horse who needs to be ridden or lunged or turned out everyday and it just wasn't fair to her to be cooped up in her stall all week except for the weekends that I could make it home to excercise her, that and my mother sort of forced me into it, either sell her myself or my mom would get rid of her. after a few months of advertising i finally found someone to buy her, but she is almost 3 hours away, so its not like i can pop in anytime i want. I have been leasing horses on and off ever since, and I just haven't found the connection with the two lease horses that i leased that i had with my old horse, and I find myself feeling quilty that I sold her, especially when a girl at my old barn told me that i should feel bad for selling her, and that I should have come home from school and gone to community college so I could have kept my horse, and when my grandpa who I have always seen as my biggest supporter when it comes to horses, is teling me that I shouldn't have sold her, and that I did poorly at my last show because "a horse is only as good as his rider" that one really stung, it was my horses first show and he was very well behaved, i have messaged the new owner on facebook, just asking for updates, and I saw some pictures and she looks skinny, she was always a hard keeper, and a little on the leaner side, but not this bad, she is 26 now so that maybe a factor. what do i do to

Update:

what can i do feel less guilty, I know that the girl that bought her loves he to death, and I am a firm beleiver in "every horse deserves to be loved by a little girl" but I have found myself avoiding the barn if i see the girl who made the comment to me about feeling this way. i use to love going to the barn, it was my excape, now it just is a chore

Missy B · Answer

Don't feel guilty. At 26, that horse really does deserve a little girl who has the time and carrots and kisses for her.  Focus on your schooling.  Keep leasing horses (don't expect attachment and bonding like from a horse that you own).

Horses are LIVESTOCK. If you think she is "family" or "pet" you're being immature, and the friend at the barn is being very immature. I mean, how much farther on your show career could a 26 year old horse take you? It's called OUTGROWING them. And if you're not OUTGROWING them, you're not improving, and you're probably doing something wrong.

As far as the Horse As Good As Rider comment, well it's only half true. We've all seen schoolmaster packer ponies go carry idiotic riders around a course because they've been doing it for 15 years, for a blue ribbon. And we've all seen a greenie explode at the brush fence but somehow a talented rider managed to stay aboard, circle and make Greenie get over the Monster fence of DOOM.  Who got more out of the class? The greenie or the schoolmaster?

Anyways, try another lease. Focus on your schooling.  The 26 year old horse is probably happier.

If you truly truly feel guilty, go have a look at the horse and give the owner some tips on care.

Pause Youth · Answer

well for one, she's 26 now. it's normal for older horses to shed Pounds, but if you worry I think you might want to visit her. you can't do much but if the horse is starving to death you can call the animal cops on them ( i have no idea what it is called in english) but anything responsible for horse's safety.

It's not yourhorse anymore, and my yearling (now 1 year old)'s old owner keeps on Messaging me how he's doing, OF COURSE, i reply but it's getting really annoying, and seems to come to the Point where I will deny her visiting if she ever asks. this is where you Need to be careful. don't offend the owner, be nice, and not too overwhelming then im sure that you can coem visit your horse.

What the Little Girl said....... ignore it, it's a small kid they all are very heavy biased on certain horses (I was a kid myself once iwould know xD) 
 I found it completely unselfish of you to sell your hose for her own sake. It would me tons to do that. and sorry to say but education > Hobby. I love my horses but School is more important.

what your grandfather said.... is he even equestrian, if he is, then he should maybe learn a Little bit more abotu horses.
OF COURSE can a horse be just as good as the rider, but ever heard of push Buttons horses? there are horses that are better than their riders, and carry them through competitions, then there are the opposites.
I can tell you I get a higher note in my dressage when I ride our warmblood mare compared to my gelding cob.

every horses is different, ok... he is a cob and im sure he would do so much better if he did carriage, however, horses vary from horse to horse. it could be because of you, or because of the horse. maybe you just don't fit for each other.

DON'T FEEL GUILTY, i really liked the fact that you sold her for the sake of her own good, the fact that she might have coem to the wrong owner is not your fault

lakelady · Answer

Well, too late. Hindsight is always 20/20. CAN you get the horse back? Because if you can't, you are right every horse does deserve to be loved by a little girl. Seems your horse has had two. Stop feeling guilty and move on. Karma will take care of your mom.

Star_of_Darkness · Answer

Nothing

You dumped the horse. The moment you sold it the horse became the property of someone else and you have no legal rights to it and have no say in what they do with it.

You can't pop in and see the horse any way. Its not yours. Its some one else's property now and you need to grow up and accept that.

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what to do about my current horse situation?

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