For those of you who believe this, why do you believe that when you get married, your spouses family is your family too?

I competely understand how you feel. Been married 25 years and only feel like fam to his family members I personally know. I have love and respect for them all to a point, but few feel like my fam to me. I have a problem connecting to people. You do not have to do anything special. Just be repsectful and what comes, comes.

Yes - married 30 years and Hubby's family is mine too. Just like my own family there are members I love, members I tolerate, and members we just aren't in contact with. I know who I can call on in times of need, or for support, and those I can't. That's no different from my side. They are a big part of my husband's life, and so they are a big part of mine. Its just one of the many things we shared over the years. To me that's what family does.

When you get married you join together in a life partnership. A husband and a wife can be considered a family. So it only makes sense that each others families become yours too! Hence the titles MOTHER in law and so on!

Try to enjoy them, and if you think of them and treat them as your family they may feel more warmly towards you!

My wife's family has always treated me as one of their own. I get along better and have more fun with them than my own family.

You are going to spend significant time with them for decades to come. That's a biggie. Pay it forward. Skin in the game.

I suggest that you dig deeper to what is really behind your refusal to connect with her and her family.