How to deal with girlfriend's very overprotective parents?

Here's the thing guy. She is living in their house and they are most likely completely supporting her. Why? Because they love their daughter. At the same time they are grown adults and know what the world outside of their home is all about. Hence the rules. The fact that she is on the pill isn't so you can have sex with her. It's in the event that she defies their rules she doesn't get pregnant! I'm sure you can appreciate the difference. If she were my daughter I'd be doing exactly the same thing they are. In fact it sounds almost exactly the way my wife and I raised our son ( except for the birth control pills obviously). If you plan to have a long term relationship with this young lady then you should respect their wishes. If you can't you'd be doing her and them a huge favor by bowing out of the relationship and finding a girl that's on her own and is sexually active as it appears that is mostly what you are concerned about.

You'll probably be pissed at me saying this and also that you love her. If that is the case and you really do, then don't encourage her to damage her relationship with her parents. The two of you may not last another 6 months. They will be her parents until the day they die! Have some respect for that fact!

I hope you consider my perspective since I'm 20 years old and female at that. Please just consider it, even if you disagree.

One thing that most guys do not understand is that women are the ones who are most extremely impacted by pregnancy. Guys always have the option to just walk away and pay child support. Women are never afforded that opportunity.

At 19, with only a high school diploma, what type of job is your girlfriend going to get if she becomes pregnant and you leave her? It is impossible to raise a family on a minimum wage job. The child would either live in poverty or the maternal grandparents would raise the child. And even if her parents support the child financially, how is she going to pursue an education? Having a child will impact her educational goals. She will go for less ambitious goals when she has a child. It is mentally exhausting to go to school. It is more exhausting when you have a child. For example, the lady in my class is in her 40s and she had a kid in college; she decided to quit school when she was younger and now she is back. She said she tried to go to college at the same time as work and have a family, but that it was too exhausting and is utterly impossible.

Sexual intercourse is not wrong. It is very wrong to have sexual intercourse when the consequences will impact the maternal grandparents or tax payers. The reason why I am abstinent is because if I were to become pregnant at 20, I would be unable to provide financially for a child. It is wrong to expect my parents support a kid. It is wrong to gamble on pregnancy when my parents will suffer the consequences.

(And FYI, my parents are not controlling. I could go out anytime I want to and stay out as late as I want to, but this has never been an issue because I am really busy with school, so busy, that I only go out once or twice a year anyways; I would rather stay at home. I work about 40 to 50 hours a week just for school).

I want to mention that birth control pills are 91% effective with real-life data. This means that there is a 9% chance of becoming pregnant on birth control pills each year with average use because not all women use birth control pills correctly. This means if you guys start having sex right now until next year, there is about a 9% chance of her becoming pregnant sometime during that year if she uses pills like the average woman. Of course, if she misses a lot of pills more than the average woman, then for all you know, they could only be 85% effective on average or they could be 95% effective. Who knows?

Condoms in real life are only 82% effective. This means if you guys use only condoms for a year, then chance of pregnancy is 18% during that year. This is why her parents have her on birth control because it is way more effective than average condom success rate even if she accidentally forgets a pill or two.

Even if her birth control is 99% effective because she takes it religiously (and never vomits or takes antibiotics), then why in the world would anyone risk pregnancy? 1% risk or less is just still too high when you cannot afford to gamble with pregnancy. It is just irresponsible and very inconsiderate to the parents.

If you really love her you should respect her parents wishes. They care about her and worry for her safety. You guys clearly have an age gap which could add to her parents worries. My parents have never talked to me about dating, but I come from a family where you don't date. They love their daughter and they're scared for her. My father would have done the exact same thing if I was allowed to date lol. And I would probably do the same. Talk to your girlfriend and understand what SHE wants to do. At the end of the day if you both care for each other, her parents will see that. Well eventually. Good luck!

That is how we grew up in my family. I used to think my parents Sucked. After I moved out of the house and was on my own, I met LOTSA people who did things my parents kept us from doing. ALOT like things you want to do with your girl. It was HARD to find a single person that didn't have problems that their parents COULD HAVE PROTECTED them from. By comparison, MY PARENTS WERE THE GREATEST EVER.

You won't understand that until you have kids or get into a situation so deep (you'll want to kill yourself) and it was something your parents/her parents tried to protect you from.

If you convince your girl to go against her parents, so you can be happy with her. When the BAD STUFF shows up, you'll dump her. Run and leave the mess for her parents to deal with. Her life will NEVER be what she wanted and you will be with someone else... Probably Happy.

shes over the age of 18 so she is an adult, her parents need to realize shes no longer a child anymore. She needs to break free from that because her parents shouldnt be dictating her life at 19. Maybe talk to them about being more trusting. Dating for four months and still not being able to do most of this stuff is ridiculous in my opinion. Normally the parents will hate you in the end but they need to realize that she is no longer a child. Good luck!

Sounds a little old fashioned, possibly overprotective. She lives at home and their rules prevail. I guess 1.she can get a job, move out and do as she pleases (may not be as you please). 2 you can abide by their rules until you marry her. 3. you can walk away and say it was an interesting 4 months.

I doubt you being a good guy.