Any suggestions for starting over?

He's a grown man dear, he'll manage fine on his own. He'll associate with others if he chooses. If he doesn't want to cook or doesn't know how, he'll get take out. He's not a child that needs tending to. Unless he's mentally or physically deficient and thus can't care for himself (which you are implying), he'll figure it out.

LOTS of people in their late teens get out into the world and live on their own, and manage just fine. Surely a man or woman old enough to have been married a while, can do the same.

You deal with your guilt by understand you aren't responsible for anyone else's feelings. If you feel the marriage needs to end, then end it. You have no control over how he chooses to feel about that, but you can at least be as kind as you can in the process of telling him and leaving. Beyond that, what he does and how he reacts, is up to him. You may actually be assuming far too much regarding his inability to care for himself or how he'll feel when you leave. He may be as relieved as you are, that it's over.

Accept the situation as it is. Completely accept it. Face yourself and ask yourself what have you done wrong to feel guilty for ? You cannot help that your feelings changed - and that you do not want to be married any more. So - face the fact that you have done nothing wrong - that you do not control your feelings. Face those things - and make the guilt leave. There are 2 kinds of guilt --- one kind is real guilt for something done wrong ... the other type of guilt is felt when you've done nothing wrong but guilt just shows up. You probably feel so responsible for him --and you want to take care of him still. He may not can be friends - and telling you that could be his way of still trying to get you to stay ... however, maybe after you leave - he might reconsider and let you be his friend and help him out. You are leaving him - but if he's capable of taking care of himself - he will. Respect your feelings - and know in your heart that you want to do right by him (and will) ... and offer to be his friend and help him - if he refuses then it's him that is refusing you. Acceptance is one way to deal with the guilt -- and make sure that you've done nothing wrong to him ... also you will know that you have offered your friendship (his choice). Recognize the real guilt ... and recognize fake guilt ... fake guilt is real . Also - is he trying to make you feel guilty ? Your husband can make other acquaintances and friends .. he can go forward with a new life, too ... new doors and people can open up for him (if he will allow it). Recognize the real guilt .. and discern the fake guilt ... see if you have anything real to feel guilty about .. if you do, then correct it if possible.

How condescending of you.

He is a grown man, and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd rather be alone and cook his own meals than be with a wife who stays out of pity.

Get off your high horse. He will be fine without you.

You are abandoning him. Your vows and promises meant nothing. What you are doing is an evil act.

What you are doing is amplifying the commonly held belief that Western females are horrible people and men should NEVER marry.