Leather harness in the gay scene?

Question

I have been wanting to get some leather gear for a while. Just a harness and bicep/wrist cuffs to start. I just want to make sure I am not sending some kind of hidden message if I get the wrong one though. I was looking at one that just goes around the shoulders and straight across the back but it said something like "The tops will have something to grab onto". This or one that just goes across the back and chest are what I am wanting simply because I like the look of it and it pulls the shoulders back. So, is there some kind of code I need to look out for or should I just wear what I like?

Think.for.your.self · Answer

Maybe you'd be better off asking on some kind of leather forum or going to a leather night at one of the bars around you and just asking around. Maybe there are books on the subject you can order.

Other than that - google " dr dick sex advice". He is a sex therapist for gay men. His site has a lot of advice. I'd paste it but homophobes have reported it before.

Anonymous · Answer

Likely there is a gay group in your city that likes sexual leather wear and perhaps contact them and see what they recommend.  Maybe they will show off their leather gear and even let you try some on.  Perhaps go to an Adult sex shop and see what they have and ask their opinion.

Bazza · Answer

And just where will you be going/what set of guys will you be hanging out with that they would all be in leather AND know the code?

Frankly, the way you speak of this - "simply because I like the look of it and it pulls the shoulders back" - if you went to a BDSM club or bar, the guys would know you are a 'tourist'.
You'll be fine in a bar full of twinks.

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Leather harness in the gay scene?

3 Answers