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? asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 5 years ago

Will my brother care if not in mother's will?

My brother left us 20 years ago and never contacted us or told us where he lived. For some reason he started visiting every holiday three years ago. It is a five hour drive. My brother also must have paid about $30,000 to mom to help for a few years of property taxes and other things. My mom just passed away but doesn't have my brother in the will she made out 15 years ago since he avoids mom. My brother sounds to be doing well financially and didn't ask about inheritance or will. Will my brother expect part of the estate of my mom or may he never ask about it?

6 Answers

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  • 5 years ago

    Memories are plastic and people have a strong need to justify their actions and see themselves in their own heads as rightous. You don't know the filters through which your brother makes sense of the world because these filters are made up his own individual experiences and thoughts. You can't read minds and you haven't maintained enough contact to know what he has been saying to himself about the past.

    Does your mother's will explain why she wanted her estate divided the way she divided it? Some people chose to pass along everything to the child who is most in need of financial security. Perhaps one child sacrificed years as a caregiver to Mom and so Mom felt that child should get the estate. Some people pass along everything to the oldest boy. Some want everything they have divided equally. Maybe a child is written out of a will because the parents had spent more on that child over the years than they had on the others, so they decided that child already got his fair share.

    If you are worried about how he feels then contact him and tell him how you see things.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    Why don't you ask him? If you know it is a five hour drive, you must know where he lives. It is easy to locate people on the computer if you don't.

    Wills bring out the worse in people and often families never forgive one another when a few try to grab everything in sight.

    Don't be selfish; share if he contributed to mom's well-being.

  • 5 years ago

    It's what is written in the will. He can ask but you'll never know until the will is read.

  • 5 years ago

    From what you said about him never visiting and then suddenly start visiting, he might be kind of upset about not being included. However if the will was already made when he wasn't around, he shouldn't be especially if he's doing well financially and hasn't asked anything about it.

  • mJc
    Lv 7
    5 years ago

    All you can do is ask him and explain the situation. He may or may not care. I would hope that his siblings would understand that whatever remains should be split equally... but I know how greed always takes over doing the right thing.

  • 5 years ago

    he might not ask and he might also realize on his own why hes not in one, i dont think your brother cares since hes making money on his own

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