Hi. I want to kill myself. Wrote 6 pages as to why. Good idea to reach out to people on FB?

OK. Hi. My name is Jimmy. I can't stop thinking about death. Through a seriously traumatic event, I have become a terrible and twisted person. My spiel is kinda sorta dark and dramatic. It talks about who I was before the event, talks about what happened during the event, how I have drastically changed into an incredibly ugly person beyond belief, how much I wish I was dead, how twisted I feel, and how I'm in the dilemma of wanting to take the same confidence program that got me into a psychotic episode (I think the way I used it was flawed, not the program itself), but I want to be good and I feel like I'm stabbing morality and God (yes, I believe in God) in the back for doing so. I'm thinking about reaching out to about five people on Facebook as to why, but I'm not so sure I should. I made a list of eight people I could potentially talk to. Most of them I'm kinda not too close to anymore or at all, but some said they'd help me if I ever needed it and others I kinda have respect for. However, part of my spiel includes why I also wanted to commit suicide over what happened with this girl 2 of them are really great friends with (though that's FAR from the main reason why I'm suicidal). I feel my family wouldn't be as helpful in this matter, and it's taking a while to find a counselor. I'm kinda desperate for someone to listen to me and guide me. I thought five people to talk to would be good, but with everything I have to say about myself I feel like it's risky. What do I do?