I'm married have been for ten years to a beautiful smart funny woman. This is a question for all pastors or therapists.?

Er, the Bible and other books of fables say lots of things about lots of things. As far as homosexuality - there are 6 clobber passages or perceived clobber passages, but let's not forget the Bible also says that people who wear clothing of mixed fabric are committing an abomination (Deuteronomy 22:11) (polyester blend anyone?), that eating shellfish is an abomination (Leviticus 11:9-12) and that we can buy slaves from the neighboring countries (Leviticus 25:44) ... its a bronze age book from a priesthood doing its best to help, as best that priesthood could, the common people to cope with life in an earlier day. So when someone offers you 50 pieces of silver for your daughter after they rape her - remember, you are supposed to accept (Deuteronomy 22:28-29) and that she is his wife who can never be divorced from him.

Believing in the book as being anywhere near literal is a waste of your time. Believing in deity makes sense if you desire - choosing to believe in and try to follow Christ (or the Christ Consciousness) makes sense if you desire. Believing in the Bible or trying to follow its code makes no sense. The book is outdated, and morally we have evolved far beyond it. Simply put, rape and so forth in the days of the Bible were property crimes, because a woman was owned, first by her father then by her husband. It is ludicrous and immoral and it has nothing to do with any deity. We are beyond that. We can clean our food now and we have running water and... so forth. The laws were created by observation and in accord with defense of property. There is nothing divine about any of them.

Now, in real terms, I wouldn't do it to my partner, BUT, I know a number of straight men, including several that are very active in Pentecostal churches that do exactly what you are describing, regularly. NOT randomly, but with close friends who, as you say, can keep their mouths shut. Those men are straight, and they have sex with a male friend or two male friends all the time. They've done it for years, or in two cases decades. I believe I am the only person that has been informed of this in any of the cases, other than those involved. So

Rationally, as long as the guy you are doing it with really WILL keep quiet and you two trust each other, its not going to harm anything, even though I would not elect to do it. YOU must decide what to do, but it isnt' going to hurt anyone, and the only things that are actually sins (IMO) are those that harm someone.

For the record, my original undergraduate education was theology, I am ordained and retain a license to minister in my state. I have never made my living at it. My graduate and post graduate education relates to a STEM field, and it is in that field that I make my living.

I would say further, if you are going to feel badly about it - don't do it, but, if like my friends, you can do it, enjoy it, remain friends with the guy and just make it an extra part of your life that brings you joy and happiness - then go ahead.

Hermes

The bible is only against people who express their homosexuality. You could still go to heaven even if you're gay. You just need to stop embracing it and act straight. You can't stop your thoughts but you can stop your actions.

The Bible is VERY clear, in both Testaments: DON'T have gay sex. Period. Not to mention the cheating on your wife, which is also a big no-no.

There is something called fidelity that is supposed to be part of what marriage is about.

Look it up.

Talk to a marriage counselor before you destroy your marriage.

.

It is a sin for a man to lay with another man.

idk