Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

People living with your s.o. (unmarried), do you sometimes get fed up?

I've been together with my other half for 1,5 years and lived together for the last 3 months of it. Since I moved in in July, things were great during the summer. We had a healthy balance of shared adventures, lazy days and separate time with our families. We're both 21. Now, however, since our third year of uni started - I'm a music teacher, he's an engineer, we're both studying AND working - things have been going not so well. Our sleeping schedule isn't in sync, because he's the most productive studying at night, whereas I get everything done during the day. As a result, he feels guilty for every moment he isn't studying and also for not spending enough time with me. I used to have a late job, but in the new place the work hours are 8.30am-5am and on other days uni doesn't last longer than 6pm either. So I get home, sleepy, maybe read a book or do some assignments and then go to bed before midnight. However, this is when my lad's real work begins. And at 4am he'll accidentally wake me by climbing into bed to finally sleep. And in the morning I'll wake at 7am and he'll just sleep for a few more hours and basically our communication these days is very limited. We try to do something together one night a week, but the last two weeks he had to cancel the date nights because he felt guilty for the time he'd lose not studying. I was a bit hurt, but didn't want to upset him. However he did notice and now he thinks I'm sad and depressed every time he does something without me.

1 Answer

Relevance
  • 5 years ago

    Welcome to Adulting 101! Today's lesson: How to realize that everything is temporary and that you have to TALK THINGS OUT - not be worried about upsetting each other.

    1. Not everything will be sunshine and roses all the time.

    2. Things get in the way: work, school, being tired, families, eventually children, shoot even pets...it's the job of both of you to deal with things and then come back together as a couple and say...okay we made it through that. NEXT!

    3. Realize you are each others soft place to fall...have a meltdown...bad day...good day...who do you get to tell and depend on for support? Each other.

    4. This too shall pass...slowly and painfully like a kidney stone! Relax!

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.